Being Gay is Exhausting

Being gay truly is exhausting. Being any kind of LGBTQ+ member can feel, at times, tiring and frustrating. Now before I go any further, I already know some (not all, but if the shoe fits...) straight people will sneer at these words and ask; "Why? Is it hard being slutty? Is it tiring for tranny men that pretend to be women, and vice versa? Is it taxing denying yourself the pleasure of being with the opposite sex?"

No. It's hard knowing that a portion of the world would rather see you suffer and die than hold hands with your partner. It's hard knowing that at gay pride celebrations, the possibility of having rubber bullets and tear gas being fired at crowds is becoming more and more of a reality, and massacres happening at nightclubs haunt the community and their ever-waking thoughts. It's hard seeing "THE FAGGOTS ARE GOING TO HELL" and "REPENT FOR YOUR SINS HOMOS" signs being proudly chanted by men, women, and even children alike. It's hard knowing that there are actual concentration camps solely dedicated to the torture and murder of gay and bisexual men in Chechnya, while their dictator denies that they even exist, proclaiming that "Gays are not people. They are for sale. They are Devils."

Being 18 years old and have already experienced homophobia on multiple accounts, both with myself and friends, I try so hard not to let those malicious people and their demented thoughts get the best of me.

But it is so. Fucking. Hard. I wonder to myself, more frequently that I'd like to admit; "Why? Why do they hate us?" It honestly is so hard to comprehend the hatred that some people have for us... I can't even imagine having that much hostility and resentment bubble deep in my heart and soul for anything, let alone a group of people whose only crime isliterally liking the same sex, or changing their gender because they felt uncomfortable with who they were.

I don't know, man. I'm not a psychotic or deranged person, so I guess I can never understand their thought process. (Now I'm not saying every homophobic person is maniacal, but if you spend your waking hours detesting gays for whatever reason, that's a bit bizarre, don't you think?)

But while they conjure up different ways of trying (key word here!) to tear down the LGBTQ+ community, we are going to keep moving forward. Being proud of ourselves for having made it this far in the world, being proud of the people we love, and being proud of ourselves.

I hope people like Marsha P. Johnson and Sylvia Rivera are proud of us; those two incredible and life-changing women that changed the world with the revolution of The Stonewall Riots. I hope people like Oscar Wilde are proud of us; the self-proclaimed martyr who, believing in "The Cause," shocked the world with scandalous works such as The Picture of Dorian Gray, and in the end, was imprisoned for being gay. I hope people like Alan Turing are proud of us; an absolutely brilliant man who saved millions of lives with his cracking of the German Enigma code during World War II, only to be punished for "gross indecency" with forced chemical castration. The bravery these men and women presented to the world is awe-inspiring and encouraging. If they had the courage to be themselves and love whoever they wanted in a time where it was extremely intolerant, and even illegal, that gives me the strength to be proud of who I am.

While being gay can be exhausting, I really wouldn't have it any other way.

Well... not being tired does sound ideal, but I'll take what I can get.