In the Lives of Others

Some may have figured out by now that I have existed mainly in two careers in my life, though both very different; there are similarities in which seem to fade into the other effortlessly. As a bouncer I did, on the most part, get to know people; depending on where and how long I worked in a venue I could get to know intimate details of their lives which often helped me deal with them better. In my Hotel career, it's actually far more intimate and detailed, and this is about those I have had the pleasure and displeasure of knowing while manning the front desk into the darkest hours of our daily rotation.

One obviously meets a wide range of characters, some you may meet only once and have the desire to banish them to a one way trip to the Sun, others you enjoy the brief encounter and hope to one day meet them again. Then you have what we call "Residents" who, for whatever reason, live at a motel for sometimes ten plus years. You are likely wondering why anyone would do that—the answer is not an easy nor simple one but basics are really just two main categories. 1. They have had issues in the past as renters, be it paying late, eviction, etc. 2. They just have no need for their own home. They choose to be where they pay rent that includes the utilities and get maid service a few times a week, as well to have someone always to talk too.

Now there are a few that stick in my mind that have been here longer than I have, people who have true plight which have caused them to be residents at a low end motel. These people are good people who just cannot catch a break and are not here by choice.

The first is a couple in their fifties who had the world at one point until the wife was diagnosed with cancer and could no longer work and the husband often had to take time off to help her plus pay medical costs, causing them to slip behind on their rent and being evicted. Now for three years they have existed here, in one room, never knowing who their neighbors will be and working hard to a better future. She has been cancer free for a while now but it had caused her lingering medical issues, yet she works five to six days a week at $12 an hour as a warehouse lumper, extremely physical work. He jumps around jobs as he has had more difficulty holding a full time one down due to commute issues. Having narcolepsy means he can no longer drive, and neither can she so they take turns riding a bike while other will use public transport. They are good people who have suffered but continue to fight on into an unknown future.

Another is a brother and sister. She is disabled and unable to work, he works his ass off twelve hours a day, walking two hours to and from work every day. He barely makes enough to cover the weekly rent of the room and I knowingly have risked my job by doing them favours of goodwill; and will continue to do so. Their story is similar to the previous. Though he lost his last job due to caring for his sister, he quickly gained a new one, but being a month behind on rent, they were evicted. I upgraded their room without extra cost (one of my many corporate violations) so he did not need to sleep on the floor and she would be able to move around in her wheelchair easier. I cannot do much more than I have but I will continue to try.

One of my favorites is a 60-year-old hippy from Alabama. We have tons of interesting conversations and he has confided in me many of his life's problems but always honest advice that I actually hold grand value in. His story is interesting. He first became a father in his very late thirties, he was a chef and also worked the tables at casinos, living a pretty full life, and admits he has made mistakes that now seep into his health. He first came here after surgery as he didn’t want to be alone in case he “Corpsed it.” They literally took out part of his guts and later replaced them. This was the first conversation I ever had with him while he gave me visuals. He has two sons in their 20s who really seem to have little ambition in life, which frustrates him as he has given them many opportunities including financial—yet they have little care to do anything further with themselves. He is never rude, never complains, just enjoys a chat and his random sleeping patterns. He enjoys staying with us but is feverishly trying to find a room somewhere but as he puts it "Not many want an old decrepit living in their house." He still tries, though. He is a quirky old hippy who tries hard at distancing himself from the stereotype of southern white racist, sometimes making him actually appear to be such, such as telling one of our black employees that he saw (cannot remember the rapper's name) in concert recently and argues with conservatives about Trump. It does get fairly amusing but he is a good man who takes responsibility for his life and tries to do the same for others; e.g. defends our motel against any complainers, etc.

There were past guests too; some were Domestic Violence victims, sexual assault victims, etc., that had stayed here for various amounts of time who often used me as a sounding board and often felt safer by the way I took care of them and knowing that I once put my life on the line to protect others. These people were often in for shorter periods, waiting for safety further away from their abusers, but often left being in my memory as those who were good people in bad situations. There are many more and I could literally write pages upon pages of people I have known, helped, and who helped me. I have always said I wanted to change the world, and one day I realized I was in a small way, but more importantly they changed my world by reminding me that humanity has its problems, from politics, violence, bigotry, poverty, and stupid things like Tide Pod eating and worshiping celebrities who had done nothing more than be famous, but in the end if we help those in need, learn from them, and set our own course according to our experiences, we can be the best we can be. These are all memories. Good and bad are all memories of the heart.