Love Hurts

I went to a convention here in my hometown. I met a guy that I immediately clicked with. Right then and there I knew I wanted him to be mine. I recognized him from school, so like any other person I searched him on Facebook and added him.

We talked on and off for months. It was a few weeks before my birthday and I told one of my really good friends about him, and she ended up telling him. Later on that night he messaged me. He told me he would love to get to know me, but he was in a rough relationship due to him leaving to the Armed Forces soon. Well, they ended up calling it quits. A little while later he asked me out right before my birthday, I was ecstatic.

My birthday came, and we had our first kiss. It felt like magic. I didn't want to stop. It went great after that. Our relationship grew. We gamed together, we texted/called each other 24/7, I went to work with him. We were always involved with each other in some type of way.

It was our 2 month anniversary we decided to go to Lake Mackenzie in his new Mustang. We got there in a few hours, and right as soon as we got there we went off the edge of a steep cliff, through the guardrails. I remember hearing him screaming as he tried to control the car. It went silent due to the point of impact. A little tree, right in front of the water stopped us. He turned towards me and repeatedly asked if I was okay until I was completely coherent. Of course, I lied and said yes. We had to climb out his window on the driver's side. I couldn't walk very well, let alone climb. He was crying. He turned and looked and me and said come on, holding out his hand for me to grab. I told him I'm fine for him to go. It was his dad's Mustang that passed away. It was all he had left. He was devastated. As he sat and the side of the road crying, I comforted him, holding him. His heart mattered more to me, rather than if I broke something or anything in my leg. He came first to me, even though he wasn't hurt one bit. I never told him I was hurt. To this day 2 and a half years later, I still have problems with my leg. He was distant for weeks after that. I gave him space.

From then on we proceeded back to normal. Went on dates all of the usual. Well, May of 2016 came he left for Basic Combat Training for 6 weeks. We wrote each other everyday, sent pictures, and got a phone call every once in a while. He would always hint at these big plans he had for when I graduated. He would always put one day we will be Mr. and Mrs. He graduated BCT in June. I couldn't go, and he had to go to AIT that following weekend. We didn't see each other for months. Not until the week of Thanksgiving. That brought us so much closer.

We would only see each other every so often since then on. January first I took a pregnancy test, it was positive, but soon after I miscarried, I assume. It was for the best in my book.

April came and he got in a dark place. He began to meet new people. He slowly started drifting away. Then out of nowhere he asked me to marry him. I said yes. He said we would get married my graduation weekend, which was that following month. Three weeks before I knew something was wrong. I forced it out of him. He said he was gonna wait until he saw me that weekend, but he said he needed to be alone. Called everything off. He needed to fix his depression. Well I said okay as tears fell down my face. He said he loved me and it's just a break. Well he got in a relationship a few days later, and got married to her 7 months later. There was no longer an us in the future.

I was so supportive through everything and got paid back like this. It took months for me to regroup myself. I locked myself away. I wasn't myself. I didn't care anymore. I tried to overdose twice. He knew I was scared to get hurt again. He told my family he would never leave unless I called it off. It was a lie. Now I sit here and wonder how much of it was a lie.

As of now to this current day I am happy again, because I found someone who truly cares and loves me. Now I have plans for the future, that I don't think is going to tear me down.