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Whether you have been in a long distance relationship for two weeks or two years, you know that with the territory of being away from your partner come conflicts. Adjusting to anything new in a relationship is hard, let alone going from seeing each other every day, to once a month, or worse.
Of course, there are going to be conflicts of a long distance relationship, but this does not mean that you two are not meant for each other. Be angry at the distance, not your partner, and try not to take out your conflicts on each other, rather working together to battle the distance. These are 10 of the most prominent conflicts in every LDR.
Being apart from your partner can cause a lot of insecurity, and with this insecurity comes jealousy. What might not have made you jealous in the slightest could possibly set you off, simply because of the distance in your relationship.
First among our list of the most common conflicts of a long distance relationship is jealousy, for many reasons. Though you have trust in your partner, the distance between the two of you becomes overwhelming in many aspects. And simply being forced to live a life in which both of you have a separate lifestyle outside of your relationship will result in jealousy, even if it is just jealousy of those who get to spend the time with them that you so desperately want.
As one of the most prominent conflicts of a long distance relationship, a relationship should not make you feel lonely; but when you're a part of an LDR, this might be one of the most difficult conflicts to get past because it is not normal.
As something that is hard to get used to, missing your significant other is not easy. This is especially true when you are looking for support, because your relationship is much different than most. And missing someone that is such a large part of your life is challenging.
However, there are plenty of ways to distract yourself. Find a routine in your life and find a new normal in the midst of missing your significant other. After all, you are missing them because you love them.
Unsatisfied Sex Life
Sex is a big problem for those in a long distance relationship, as it is very difficult to have a satisfying sex life while you are far from each other. This may lead to other difficulties such as being uncomfortable with your sexuality or feeling too much pressure to please your partner when the time comes after an elongated time apart.
Though there are ways to get around this, online sex might not be as satisfying to many as it might be after the first few times. You have to find enthusiasm in your sex life for the time being and try to remember that this is not permanent. Spice it up, try not to let it get boring, and be sure to remind each other how much you are attracted to each other, even if you can't physically feel each other's skin.
With boring in mind, let's get into the fact that you can't text your partner "what're you doing?" every 10 minutes. As one of the most troublesome conflicts of a long distance relationship, relying on everyday conversations to keep your connection alive can get a bit problematic. Because really, there's only so much you can say, especially if you two have been long distance for a while now. Telling each other about your day will only last a little, and especially when it comes to texting, there's only so much you can do to keep the conversation alive.
Don't stress out, every LDR has been there. And though you might feel like the problem weighs on your shoulders, you shouldn't. If you two were together, you wouldn't constantly be talking, a lot of the time spent together can just be in silence, or watching TV. So don't push it. You can spend time together on FaceTime not talking, just enjoying each other's company instead.
Along with the insecurities that come with being apart from each other comes doubt. This is different from jealousy, but the two can often be combined. Having doubt does not have to mean that you have doubt in the passion you have for each other, but rather a doubt in the pain and loneliness that comes with being away from each other.
This may be harder to deal with because there might not be anything you two can do to fix this, but being open and honest with each other about the doubt that comes with the territory of being in a long distance relationship will do wonders for your communication.
Feeling Detached from Their Life
Next, on our list of the most common conflicts of a long distance relationship, struggling to feel a part of your partner's life may become difficult. Because of the necessity of having your own life outside of your relationship, you may feel like it is hard to include your partner in your life without completely separating them from your friends, job, and life at home.
Because they cannot physically be there, it can be easy to forget to tell them things, or even forget to call them as much, if you are preoccupied with your life at home. As a balance that takes time to adjust to, don't freak out if you feel like you are not included in a lot of their life; they're adjusting just as much as you are.
Fear of Cheating
No matter how confident you might be in your relationship, adding distance into the mix will certainly put your trust to test. No matter how much trust you have in your partner, the thoughts may creep into your mind about what they are really doing when they say you are going to the movies, and vice versa.
If you have a fear of infidelity due to the distance, you should not freak out. Though if there are other reasons behind your fear, this is where you might want to be a bit more cautious. But if the distance is the only factor leading your mind to the thought of cheating, you are not alone. Speak to your partner about your doubts, and find a way to find peace in your distance together. You never know, they may be having the same thoughts.
Temptation to Cheat
If you feel a temptation to cheat, you have two options: remove yourself from temptation situations, or break off the relationship before you hurt your partner or yourself. There is a fine line between feeling tempted and putting yourself in a temptation situation.
And you need to take a step back and ask yourself if you are being tempted by life, or if you are tempting yourself to cheat. No matter how far your partner might be, you need to respect your relationship with your actions. And as one of the biggest conflicts of a long distance relationship, having temptations to cheat is something that you need to be transparent about.
Of course, fighting is also a conflict in any relationship, but fighting while you are far away from each other can often amplify the scenario. If you are not able to express your feelings over the phone and resort to a text conversation about difference or issues, you're already doing something wrong. Fighting over text almost always leads to miscommunication, harsh words being said, and a conversation that cannot be erased once said.
If you have a problem with your significant other, you should call them, FaceTime them, or wait until you see them, if it is in the near future. In order to find the best way to communicate, you can't rely on your words transferring the correct way over text. And worst of all, you can't physically be together to feel as if the conflict is solved. Find the best way to communicate and the best way to resolve things.
Lack of Communication
To complete our list of the most common conflicts of a long distance relationship, of course, we had to mention a lack of communication happening in an LDR. This is because communication has to be regular in a long distance relationship, and to most couples, this is not normal. Instead of waiting until the end of the day to see each other and talk, you have to rely on regular communication with each other throughout the day to feel a part of each other's lives and remain consistent.
Your communication also has to remain transparent with each other, and as we know, long distance relationships come with a lot of doubts, pain, missing each other, and miscommunication. So instead of pretending everything is fine, you have each other to rely on and fall back on.