10 Worst Things About Dating

Having been a veteran of the dating scene for the past ten years, I can honestly say that I enjoy dating about as much as going to the dentist. The singles scene is one that never ceases to amaze me when it comes to the sheer amount of awfulness people have to endure in order to try to find The One.

Many of us eventually get discouraged from dating and just decide it’s not happening. It’s not just guys, either; girls are starting to give up, too. I count myself as one who can honestly say that I had one too many bad dates and decided I had better things to do with my time than meet other singles.

Wondering what made me give up? I’ll list some of the worst things about dating that drove me (and many others) away from dating.

10. “Yeah, you feel like hanging out?”

Back in the old days, dates were pretty unambiguous. A guy would ask out a girl, present her with flowers, and the girl would be pretty aware of where she stood in terms of his desire. These days? We dance around the word “date” as if it’s the worst possible thing we could say.

No one ever wants to say that they are looking for a relationship or that they want to date these days out of fear of looking desperate. So, rather than admit we want to date someone, we “hang out.” Or, we “are just talking to them.”

Obviously, this leads to some people using this as an excuse to have multiple partners and avoid commitment while doing it. When called out, the commitment-phobe will often say, “Hey, I was just talking with you. I never said I was ready for commitment.”

If you’ve ever been on the receiving end of this, you’ll understand why this is one of the worst things about dating.

9. “Here’s the check…”

Feminism is great, and we all love it. Unfortunately, with the rapidly-changing social norms of our world, some traditions seem to stick around. One of them is the tradition of a man paying for his date’s tab.

The thing is, people aren’t always on the same page about paying for a date these days. Some guys refuse to let a woman pay, saying it’s “not right.” Other men insist on having a girl pay. Some women insist on having the guy pay, while some may be insulted at being refused the chance to pay.

So, for those spare few seconds, both people are trying to figure out how to handle a bill without it being awkward. And it’s always awkward.

Speaking of awkwardness, can we talk about how awkward the end of the date tends to be? It’s one of those moments where no one really knows what to expect or what to do to make it a smooth night. Do you kiss at the end of the first date? Do you have sex on the first date? When should you call them back?

The worst kind of end-of-date awkwardness, though, is when you have to cut the date short due to a date’s bad behavior. Do you tell them what they did wrong, or do you just leave for the bathroom and not come back? Is there even a good way to cut things off early?

If that isn’t one of the worst things about dating, I don’t know what is.

Whoever said you’d have to kiss a lot of frogs before you meet your prince had no idea how right they were. Everyone has had at least one foul date, with many of us having dozens or so. The sheer number of awful people you meet before you find one person worth talking to makes you wonder why it’s even worth it.

6. “I swear I’m not looking at his profile again.”

Social media is a great invention when it comes to meeting new people and staying connected with loved ones. The problem is that it’s way too tempting to stalk a date’s social media accounts to find out if they’re legitimately the person they say they are, who they’re hanging out with, what they’re doing, etc.

Don’t get me wrong. Facebook stalking and checking their social media profiles can be a good way to make sure that you’re dating someone who’s legitimately single. We’ve all heard of people who ended up discovering their boyfriend’s fiancee this way.

However, a little too much stalking can make you get a bit creepy: Nothing is as unsettling as having a person mention something they saw on your social media that you didn’t tell them yourself.

5. “Play it cool.”

For reasons beyond my understanding, it seems like our society really doesn’t like the idea of having people show how they really feel. If you get too affectionate too quickly, people call you clingy. So, you have to dial down your enthusiasm a notch... or ten.

That's aggravating in any case, but what makes it even worse is knowing that your date is probably doing the exact same thing. So you both are in this weird competition about who cares less, while trying to get intimate with one another.

Why would anyone play it cool when they really want to get closer to their partners? Why is it that we are so scared of getting close to people? It’s so fake! Playing it cool just doesn’t make sense, and it remains one of the worst things about dating in today’s world.

Dating is stressful, mmkay? When you are going on your first date somewhere, there are so many uncertainties that can drive you up the wall. You stress over the right outfit, the right makeup, getting the perfect date idea, and even things like figuring out how to talk to your date.

Truth be told, dating has become far more unpredictable and that makes it even harder to plan ahead. For those of us with anxieties, the sheer amount of panic you get from a first date is high on the list of the worst things about dating.

When our parents were single, it used to be that people would meet at a bar. Then, from the bar, they would go on a date. Then dating would lead to marriage, or a breakup. Today, it’s just not the same. The process has turned into a jumbled, complicated, and involved thing.

Modern dating goes a little more like this:

1. Meet a person through actual human interaction, or swipe left 4000 times to find one person who is willing to talk to you.
2. Go on a date, which may or may not actually be a date. Just claim you’re “talking to them.”
3. Hook up with someone a bunch of times, while hoping they want a relationship with you.
4. Drop subtle hints that you want to be in a relationship, possibly get told to wait longer.
5. Maybe actually date, but only after you break up with all your sidepieces?
6. ??
7. Marry, maybe. Probably not.

2. “Can I text him now?”

Every person has had that moment where they are waiting for someone to text. Seconds seem to turn into minutes, minutes into hours. You’re trying to play it cool, so you don’t call them. But you sit there, next to the phone, hoping that your date will finally say something. You stare at the phone so long that you honestly think you’ll develop psychic powers before it rings. It’s a nightmare, right?

Then, when you feel enough time has passed, you finally text them. I swear, it sometimes feels like a physical release. Why you can’t call them immediately is all due to the fact that you don’t want to scare them away. It’s tension-inducing and remains one of the worst things about dating.

Finally, the absolute worst aspect of dating seems to have remained one of the worst things about dating from years ago. The constant head-games people play to keep others interested are nothing new. Things like trying to make others jealous, pulling away to make a partner chase after you, all that other stuff? It’s as old as time itself.

Sometimes, dating changes. People never do, though. Such is life, love, and all things in between.