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5 Signs That You're Secretly a Jerk

Are you really a jerk?

We all have our moments. Everyone is kind of an a-hole at times. But even though we might try to be semi-decent human beings, and we might show our "good" sides to the world, it turns out, some people you might think are perfectly nice are absolute jerks—including you!

"But how can I tell if I am a jerk?" I hear you ask. Well, there are five very simple ways to tell if you are a jerk.

You Have No Manners

I was raised to be polite and decent. But if you don't have any manners, and let's say a young lady holds the door open for you, waiting in the rain for you to walk up to her, only to walk through the door and NOT say thank you, you, my friend, are a jerk. And that is what she wants to tell you, but she won't, because she is too well-mannered.

If you don't say please and thank you, treat wait staff or servers like dirt and speak to people with an undeserved air of arrogance, you're a total, 100 percent, fresh cut, free range jerk. 

You Like It When People Fail

We have all been guilty of this at times, and no more so than when it is a celebrity, but if you are always glad when someone fails, then your results are in: you're a jerk.

We all want to succeed, but the failure of other people shouldn't make you happy, so I will stop gloating the next time a celebrity's terrible children's book doesn't sell well. 

You Don't Tolerate Anything Different

If you're not interested in it, then it's not worth being interested in. This applied to anything from music, to sexuality, and even politics; if it's not what you think, then it is wrong. And not only do you feel this way, you also feel the need to tell the entire universe how passionately you feel about things you disagree with, no matter how trivial they might be.

You're such a jerk and have such a dull life that you feel the need to actually take the time to search for things you dislike and then tell people how much you dislike them and how the people that do like them are losers. You are wasting time online telling people what they are listening to or doing is wrong, but somewhere, they're the losers? OK, then. You are a troll, nothing more, nothing less.

It's Never Your Fault

We all make mistakes; everyone screws up once in a while—everyone apart from you, that is. You never screw up. It is always someone else's fault and you are so very quick to point that out. You will throw someone innocent under a bus to save your own skin, even though the mess-up was on you. If you behave like this, you should know that nobody trusts you and everyone keeps an eye on you. 

You Tell Everyone What a Good Person You Are

And any time you actually do something good, you have to tell the whole world, you can't just do it. You have to sprinkle it all over social media for attention. If you were a decent person and you weren't just doing it for attention, you wouldn't tell anyone! You make a huge deal out of even the tiniest acts of what most people would call courtesy, but you call "kindness"—but you only do it for attention, so absolutely none of it makes you an actual good person. 

I Can Be a Jerk!

Everyone can be kind of a tool sometimes, and we are all a bit guilty of at least one of these things; but if you are guilty of all of them, then I hate to be the one to tell you this, but you are a jerk, and it's no secret.  

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