Simone Olak
Humans is powered by Vocal creators. You support Simone Olak by reading, sharing and tipping stories... more

Humans is powered by Vocal.
Vocal is a platform that provides storytelling tools and engaged communities for writers, musicians, filmmakers, podcasters, and other creators to get discovered and fund their creativity.

How does Vocal work?
Creators share their stories on Vocal’s communities. In return, creators earn money when they are tipped and when their stories are read.

How do I join Vocal?
Vocal welcomes creators of all shapes and sizes. Join for free and start creating.

To learn more about Vocal, visit our resources.

Show less

A Little Bit of Both

Why it feels freeing being a little masculine in a society that forces me to be feminine.

The man in this image is wearing aprx 10-inch heels and a full face of makeup.

I recently got a very short haircut, shaved sides and all, and I have gotten countless unsolicited comments on the matter.

Many people seem to like it, but many others seem to think that it is too masculine.

In all honesty, that's exactly why I like this haircut. It's a little exhilarating to feel like I've successfully rebelled against this specific standard which Middle Eastern women are expected to uphold.

This standard includes having curves, wearing makeup, being well dressed, and having long, luxurious hair. However, in recent years, I have witnessed many women reject this standard and embrace the elements of themselves that do not fit into this box.

Before cutting my hair for the first time, I fit into it, but I slowly started to shed the walls that enclosed the personality I had always wanted to unleash. Part of this process was letting myself have the hair that I want. And I wanted it because it is masculine.

Another thing about this society that I live in is that it does not simply force one into this box of a being, but it also rejects the fact that anything else can possibly be attractive or correct in any way. The society and the people in it believe that they are the one and only 'right'.

And this only enhances my joy at the fact that I finally found the courage to do what I please regardless of what the community wants me to be. I have finally found the courage to at least try to be the real me even if I have to fight for it. And I do fight.

I fight for it with my mother. I fight with some of my friends. I almost fought with a cab driver the other day because I'm a regular of his and he felt the need to comment on my hair. And I will continue to fight with everyone who thinks they have the right to give their negative opinion about my hair, without being asked to do so. 

This is my own journey, own life, but first and foremost, my own body. Therefore, this was my decision. And one that I do not regret.

I wanted to embrace that part of myself, and, since I have, I finally feel free. I feel like the person I was always supposed to be. And I feel more attractive than I have in quite a while.

Now Reading
A Little Bit of Both
Read Next
For The Love Of A Daughter Chapter 1