A Thing or Two About Unrequited Love

A lot of times, everyone comes to a place of identifying something that a lot more than tickles their fancy. Yes, you see a pair of shoes, or a really ugly dress that you strongly believe would look better on you than anyone else. Or you spot that dude you graduated University with driving a Bentley, the same color and model you all drooled over after soccer practice before talking about girls, and comparing the sizes of your penises; or, you run into an old girlfriend (well, maybe more of an acquaintance), but one with whom you shared a special connection with on many a drunken night, and went shopping with, and fought over boys with until life took you both to opposite ends of the planet. The possible scenarios of wanting what is not accessible to us are never ending. The one scenario that I naively assume at least sixty five percent of the world can relate with is wanting someone we cannot have at the moment that we want them.

Love, to me, is such a simple thing. As an individual I have always been inclined to love unconditionally (much to the frenzy of friends and family) and without any further agendas, but growing up and moving across countries, states, people, and cultures, I have come to an understanding that perhaps, I am not as 'worldly' as I would have once been so convinced I was.

A curious mind like mine has paid some ear to some of the tips offered by relationship coaches trolling the internet, one of which implies that rejection should automatically be a recipe for instantly identifying your initial object of your affection as a 'turnoff', seeing that the fact they do not want you back should be enough of a scratch on your healthily robust ego to enable you turn up your nose, and make a move on to fresher waters.

Is this the person we all should be, in proving we love ourselves enough?

Love, to me, is 'strength'. It is not easy to boldly face the way we feel at awkward moments like these, but in facing them and acknowledging them for what they really are, we find freedom—the chance to accept, heal, and move on, taking as much time as we need. So, while I would love to give the finger to anyone who would dare reject my offer of love, I must come to understand that sometimes what we desire does not desire us, simply because [it is my belief that] the universe which God created disallows it.

Perhaps, nobody knows what exactly is good enough for them. So, maybe we are strategically placed within cultures, stereotypes, and religions that in some way help us meander our way through storms and moments of calm.

What I am pretty much trying to say is, if you had the courage to open up to someone about how you feel and they decline, you are challenged to pull out your red flag and face the bull that threatens to use your bruised ego to bring you shame that simply has no place there.

In the first place, did you take a good enough look at those pair of shoes? Are they your size? Are they comfortable? Can you sport them everyday for years and years and still enjoy wearing them with the consequent defects here and there? Do you wear them boldly in the rain and through water, mud and snow and feel like you are riding Aladdin's magic mat? Can you climb trees comfortably in them? Do they make you look really good? Shocks! I'm getting carried away now....

Hopefully, this put a smile on your face. Grow in style and grace and happy journey to loving yourself.