Age Gap Love

You’re at the mall and you see a girl who looks like she’s in her early 20s. She’s holding hands with a man who looks like he could be her dad. You see them smiling and laughing with each other, trying to figure out in your head if that’s her boyfriend or dad. You might be thinking maybe she’s only with him because he has money and he’s her sugar daddy. Or maybe they actually love each other?

Each person has different reasons on why they choose to be with a partner who is much older than them. There are some who are in the relationship solely for monetary purposes. There are others who are in the relationship because they both love each other unconditionally. I feel there is still a negative stigma around these types of relationships and is slowly starting to gain more acceptance.

I am in a relationship with a man who is 30 years older than me. I’m 23 years old, and he’s 53 years old. I’ve faced negativity, judgment, and criticisms on my relationship. Even when we go out places, I’ll get dirty looks from women or hear comments mentioned under their breath about our relationship.

Did I commit to this relationship because he is wealthy? No, I didn’t. Money is not a top priority of mine when it comes to relationships because I like to help provide in the relationship. I committed to this relationship because I genuinely love the man. There is an undeniable chemistry and I feel like we have known each other for years. It’s something I have never experienced before in any relationship.

I have dated guys in my age range in the past and quickly learned that they were more consumed with sex than anything else. I believe there should be a healthy balance between sex and the rest of the relationship.

I’ve always considered myself an old soul and have been attracted to older men. It wasn’t until I met my current boyfriend that I decided to have a relationship with an older man.

I have been lucky to meet some other women my age who are in relationships with an older man. I’ve spoken with them about why they are in their relationship. The most common response I received was it has been the happiest and most loving relationship they have experienced. There were different reasons for all of them, but that was a commonality between them all.

I like being with an older man because 99 percent of older men have their life together and have it figured out. I don’t have to worry about them playing games with me. I have that security knowing that he truly wants to be with me and isn’t after one thing.

I’ve been asked different questions about our relationship such as “What if you guys want kids?” or “What will you do when he dies?” Another reason why I am with an older man is because I don’t want kids. I know it is a standard for society that all women need to be mothers and have kids, but it has never been an interest of mine. I am head over heels in love with this man and even though he’s 30 years older, I would rather spend however much time we have together than live my life without him.

Although we have faced our share of struggles with gaining acceptance from friends & family, we never let that get in the way of our relationship. It is still not the “norm” for society’s standards when it comes to relationships, but we haven’t let that keep us apart. We’ll still get confused looks when out in public together. Sometimes people do mistake us for being father and daughter.

Through the difficulties we have faced, we have strengthened our bond even more. I can’t begin to picture my life without him in it. Even though we’ve faced our struggles and criticisms about our relationship, I wouldn’t change it for the world.