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Baby Boomers, You're the Worst

How America's Golden Generation Became Vampires

It might hurt to admit, but everything your parents have told you is wrong. Not just wrong, but utterly destructive.

The Baby Boomers, the cutesy name for the children born after the end of WWII, were touted as America's pride and joy. Enjoying a post-war economy, children of the 1960s, founders of the original hippie movement, yupis of the 1980s, and symbols of the 'American Dream,' are sucking the life out of the country.

Baby Boomers are selfish.

How? To begin, they were (up until Millennials came around) the largest generation America had ever seen. Bursting with confidence in the brand new suburbs off the Eisenhower highway, these kids had it made. The Federal Government had supported affordable higher education, trades programs, manufacturing jobs, low home prices, and a safe social security and pension plan for when it's time to retire.

However, while they were enjoying the spoils of the second half of the twentieth century, they let a lot slip right by them. The nostalgia of America at war put blinders on them. As the Berlin Wall fell and America was positioned to lead the way, interventionist warfare seemed to be unquestioned. It has been 17 years since the Iraq war and over $20 trillion has been spent to fight an endless war and a faceless enemy.

The problem is, that $20 trillion the Federal Government used to enrich the military industrial complex was supposed to be OUR social security, our infrastructure, our investment in education, green technology. And what do they say now about our social security now that they are hitting the age to start cashing in? "Oh we get it, but there's not enough for you."

Baby Boomers are financially illiterate.

Want more evidence that your parents are totally clueless about money? Nearly 70% of Boomers still pay a mortgage. Three times more Boomers are now filing bankruptcy than any previous generation. Simply put, they're broke. Their obsession with consumption, with short-term gains, and the latest trends has allowed them to plan so poorly throughout their entire careers that they actually have less money than when they started!

They're brainwashed. Whatever poison mainstream network news they are watching, they do not even realize how easy they are to manipulate. Their notions of global economics, geo-political problems, global warming, war, all of it, is based on a pre-internet view of the world. They have no concept of a connected world able to come together to solve a problem because most of them have never stepped foot outside of America and they wouldn't know a decent Google search if Siri was screaming it at them.

Baby Boomers are really unhealthy.

Lastly, they have created a health epidemic. They love fast-food, box grocery store, Betty Crocker, microwave meals, and it shows. They are the fattest and nutritionally naive group around. They laugh at their kids going vegan or anything in the organic aisle. Yet, they have sky rocketing rates of heart disease, cancer, Alzheimer's, strokes, and diabetes. Bad habits they have passed on to their children, who will hopefully not follow too closely in their parents' footsteps.

To conclude, whatever a Baby Boomer tells you to do—do the exact opposite. Save and invest your money. Avoid debt at all costs. Question your government and actually hold them accountable. Eat a healthy balanced diet. Spend time exploring a passion or travel, not on a giant mortgage. With the Vampire generation finally retiring and slipping away (slowly) from power and control, it is time for the younger generations to not only fix all the problems the Boomers caused, but to completely transform our country for the new millennium.

Goodbye Vampires, it's time for the light to come in.

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