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I Save a Shit Load of Money Over the Holiday Seasons
I do not miss fretting over what to buy my significant other. Gone are the days where I would visit store after store trying to find something he would love. Gone are the days of smelling every single aftershave in store and hating them all for giving me the worst migraine known to man-kind. I certainly do not miss putting all that effort in for them to use my gifts for a month maximum, I mean I spent £80 on an aftershave, do you know what I could buy for that?
Yeah, that's right.
Not one pizza, not two but eight.
Eight large pizza's. And let me tell you something, pizza is all you need in life, pizza is a sure thing. You know pizza is going to fulfill your every desire, boyfriends? they're not a sure thing.
Besides, pizza's don't talk shit.
Pizzas don't make you cry.
Pizzas are your best friend.
If you had a conversation with my ex right now, he would probably tell you that I can be stubborn. He would probably tell you that I always think I'm right.
Well, let me start by saying this:
A) For once in his life, he's right. I am always right.
B) I don't need to be sorry about the fact I'm always right anymore.
Maybe I was stubborn, but I still look back on some arguments and remember having to reach a compromise, having to agree to disagree, and if you're stubborn like me you'll understand how difficult that is to do. I must have apologised over a hundred time for things I'm still not sorry about and the thing about being single is you no longer have to do that, because the only person you want to make happy is yourself.
And I never need to apologise to myself.
Because myself understands that she may screw up sometimes but she's still fucking amazing.
I no longer have to worry about another persons feelings.
You can be totally in love with a person and still manage to do things that leave them feeling shitty.
MOMENT OF HONESTY
I can be the worst person in the world when I've had a drink.
I'm three types of people
1) HORRIBLE - I mean really passive and nasty with my words.
2) A MESS - Like, I may as well be a three year old because I can barely string a sentence together (not the most attractive I must say)
3) or really fucking hilarious.
But he got the one, two, and three throughout our seven years together.
So little miss stubborn over here isn't too stubborn to admit that she could be a grade A twat sometimes, the main thing I'm sorry for throughout our whole relationship to be honest.
I was young, and learning your limits with alcohol is something that comes with time.
But back to the point- I'm glad that I can no longer hurt someone who doesn't deserve it.
I can watch what I want without an eye roll.
Although I do think he was a little concerned at my fascination with murder documentaries.
Now it all makes sense!
He didn't want a relationship because he was afraid I was going to murder him.
Maybe he was right... hope he's still sleeping with one eye open.
But seriously, there were times where I would pretend to enjoy the things he liked watching, but inside, my little brain was going ten to the dozen thinking about why cows have spots, and how the earth is always rotating but we don't feel it at all... that's how BORED I was, but we do things all the time for the people we love, including watching absolute GARBAGE.
Now I watch what I want, when I want.
I Lost a Shit Load of Weight
Breakups are shit.
Total and utter shit.
But there is something positive, because after all of the stress and sleepless nights, there you are one day stood in front of the mirror and you're like, shit where did that double chin wonder off to?
Jeans are looser, t-shirts too.
And it feels good.
Because we all get comfortable in relationships, I know I gained like at least five stone. I don't know if its just a woman thing, but once you have someones love, you don't feel the need to impress them anymore, or at least I didn't, and so I seriously let myself go.
But I feel great again now, I'm looking more and more like my old self every day, and its fabulous!
Lets get a little serious for a second now.
The thing about being single is, you become the main focus in your life. Obviously we still have people in our lives that we love and care for, but your family and friends aren't dependent on you. They don't need you to be any more or any less than what you are, they accept you for whatever you choose to be, because their love is unconditional.
Relationships don't work that way. We like to think that our boyfriends, girlfriends, spouses will love us no matter what, but that's not the case. As soon as you stop contributing to their life in a positive way you are no longer what they need or want in their life.
Because us humans are all about growth, we all want to be better people, do better things. Rise and rise until we feel we have achieved all of our goals.
When you are single, truly alone, you learn a lot about the person you are. The good, the bad. You choose what path you want to walk down every single day, making decisions that influence only your life and yours alone. You do the things you want to do. Traveling, learning, experiencing.
You do the things that make you happy, because you don't need to make anybody else happy anymore.
When you learn all of the things that make you happy, when you love being in your own company, when you love life because life is incredible, not because there's someone in it who you love, you truly learn to love yourself.
And once that happens, you have grown as a person.
And when you experience personal growth...
Well, the world is your oyster.