Between New Year's and Valentine's

Relatives asking you, hiding behind a glass of eggnog, when you will find someone or going to a bar on New Year's Eve with friends, hoping to find a stranger before the last 30 seconds of the year. So you made it through the holidays single and want to change your status? Well, its time to make some resolutions before you can do that.

2017 was not in your favor, but not all of that was bad luck. 2018 will be just the same if you don't make some changes. You need to get out more this year, if you are looking for a relationship. Even with the advent of Tinder and Match.com, people will still look for public places to meet people. The public is a neutral place where most people meet, even if you talk with them through Tinder. You don't 'Netflix and chill' or invite strangers back to your apartment. Meeting in public is a secure and safe way to meet people which keeps a level playing field for both parties.

Time to Get Out There

With that being clarified, where would you even start looking to meet people? Well... if you want something which will be lasting or be something more than physical, look for places which hold your hobbies. Meet more bookish types in the library, talk with people when you go to the gym, or find your own nook in the world. You could even start your own club.

Another option you could try is looking at your city'swebsite or look at local events. The small city of Kalamazoo, my hometown, even has one. Even if it isn't tailored to your liking, it piqued both parties' interests and is also a good start. Try to avoid events with alcohol because that ruins having an actual connection with people or remembering that you even made one.

The More the Merrier

Explore places with your friends. Your confidence increases when your friends are around. Even if you don't meet anyone that night, it will still be one spent with friends. The reason most people desire a relationship is so that they don't feel alone. Don't forget your friends. They might even lead you to a future partner as well.

Allow yourself to have friends of the sex which you are attracted to. Not everything is about sex and there is a person behind the face. Just as before, those friends could help you meet your potential future partner as well. I met my current girlfriend three years ago because of an accidental friend request. That only happened because my friend's list had expanded and put my name on a recommended friend list for a larger group.

Remember that the only goal is to meet more friends and get phone numbers. Do not expect to get into a relationship by a specific time. Life moves at its own pace and your intentions must change if you want to be happy with yourself.

Don't Rush

Your first priority isn't being in a relationship. Make friends and enjoy life. People will ask you out if they find you interesting and enjoyable. If you have a strong connection with someone, you could ask them out. A strong connection doesn't happen in weeks or by forcing that level of trust.

The easiest way to find others who will love you, is for you to love yourself. It sounds lame, but finding confidence without reminding yourself about your good and constantly improving self seems impossible. No one is asking for perfect, but being the best 'you' is the best thing you can do. You don't need a relationship to feel happy. Being happy with yourself is a strong step. A relationship is just inviting someone to be happy with you.

There is a saying that your partner should be your best friend. Treat your search for a partner like looking for a best friend, passively. Good luck with your search and enjoy yourself.