So today I want to address the question: Can a woman make the first move? You might be surprised by the answer!
So a few women have been coming to me and asking me how to get a guy to ask them out, or how to get him to even know they exist. They want to know if it’s ok, or even appropriate, to make the first move.
My answer is YES. In fact, I recommend it!!
NOW hold on just a minute here! I know what you’re thinking.
All lot of you might be wondering why I’m doing a video like this—especially since I’m always so adamant about letting the man chase YOU! And I still am recommending that you let the man pursue you, that hasn’t changed. But in case you haven’t noticed, the world is changing, and we need to keep up! If you keep insisting on never making the first move then you could be missing out on some really great opportunities that other women are jumping on.
So yes, you can, and should approach a guy! Men are tired of approaching women and getting flat out rejected.
But hold up just a second here! Before you go calling up some dude and asking him out, I want to give you the 3 steps on the most effective way for a woman to make the first move and still remain in your feminine energy.
There are 3 easy steps on how to make the first move while still being feminine.
Step 1. Just say HI!
The first way to do this is to reach out and say hi! You can do this via dating app or social media or IRL, remember that? Face to face interaction? That still happens.
Be careful with social media because many people on there already are in relationships.
Step 2. Strike up a conversation.
You could say something casual like; "Hey—you look familiar." or "Have we met?" Or if you have a mutual friend you could say: "How do you know so and so? I went to high school with him." If you’re standing in line at the grocery store you could ask him what he thinks about a product he’s buying. “How’s that bulletproof coffee? Does it taste good?” As a general rule, dudes buying groceries for themselves are most likely single. If you’re out and you see a cute guy somewhere you can say something like: “Aw your dog is so cute—can I pet him?” Guys know that dogs are great for getting chicks to approach them.
The key here is to make it genuine and non threatening. It’s just something that pops into your head then comes out your mouth.
I’m the master at that.
Don’t be afraid of looking stupid. Imagine how dumb I feel right now sitting here alone in my office talking to my iPhone. But I can do this because I don’t care what anyone thinks of me, and I’ve made it my life’s mission to help people such as yourself find and keep love. So do not be afraid of making a fool of yourself!
What’s the worst that could happen? He may give you a strange look and walk away. But trust me when I tell you, even if the guy isn’t interested in talking to you or dating you, he’ll have some sort of respect that you made the effort to strike up a conversation. You really have nothing to lose.
Step 3. Do nothing.
Yes, you heard me right. You’ve taken the first step and broken the ice. Now, the ball is in his court. You do not want to ask him for his phone number, offer your phone number, or ask him to go on a date with you. That’s his job—he's the man here! But the great news is—now you’re on his radar.
BUT, that’s where it ends ladies. If he’s interested he will ask for your phone number. Once he has your phone number, he knows how to get in touch with you.
This is where it’s kind of difficult to be a woman. We’re taught that if you want something in life, that you’ve got to go out there and get it! You’ve got to take some sort of action. This is true in everything in life except romance. The hardest part is to hang back and let him chase you!
The reason for this is because the feminine energy is receptive one, we are more about just being, whereas the masculine energy is the more active one, it's all about doing.
If you are the one taking action and chasing him, you will be too much in your masculine energy, and you will repel a masculine man away from you.
But you can make the first move. Say hello, strike up a conversation, and be your fun, happy, bubbly self. Then you need to hang back and see what happens. And, who knows, you might be glad you approached him first!
To inquire about hiring me as your dating coach, send me an email [email protected]