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We've all been there, ladies. We meet a guy and he makes our hearts race, our palms sweat, and our thoughts get scrambled. We all have that one guy that we thought would be the one someday. Married with kids and a dog. Somehow, we always end up picking the wrong guy to be our Mr. Right.
His name was Kenny. I was working my usual night shift at a local retail store. It had been an unusually busy night and we were all pretty tired and ready to get out of there. I don't usually work the register, but that night they needed backup. So there I was on my register, minding my own business when I spotted him. I don't want to put him on blast with pictures because this story gets very juicy. Let me give you a little mental image.
He's born and raised in Yonkers, NY. Something about those New York guys. I'm telling you. He was about six foot. Maybe an inch or so under the six foot mark. He was just the right amount of chub. Muscles and tattoos. Man of my dreams.
I'm ringing the customers up as quick as I can because the endgame here is to clear out my line so the handsome stranger has no choice but either stand in line or come through my line. I'm not sure why, but he ended up in my line. I avoided eye contact, I stuttered a few times. Typical mess in front of this guy. I was blowing it.
The awkwardness broke when he asked about my tattoos and my response was simply, "my tattoos are nothin' compared to yours." All while, I'm reaching over and checking out all his tattoos. He was the only customer in my line so, I milked it. Needless to say, I got his phone number and called him the next day.
Jumping ahead a few weeks, after I called him. We met up and hung out. We instantly clicked. I was on cloud nine. I had this hunk of a man and he was mine. All mine. Or at least I thought he was all mine.
This is where the story is going to take a turn because truth be told, I'm still not 100% over this dude and I'd rather not talk about the good things. As that is not the point of this article. I want to change tunes and tell you why he was the male version of a succubus. Without the killing part, unless you count mentally killing someone.
About a month into the relationship, he started getting calls from his ex. Who was in Hawaii at the time. Apparently the story between them is they met back in New York and she left her husband to be with him but then left him to work things out with her husband. Which is why she moved to Hawaii and I guess when it didn't work out, she wanted Kenny back. My feelings didn't matter to either one of them.
We dated from August 2016 to February 2017. She was scheduled to return to town on February 2. I lost everything that I thought made me happy. When she came back to town, he dropped me. No contact. Nothing. Two weeks later, I try calling him to tell him how I feel about the situation and his WIFE, yes his wife, texted me back.
My whole world changed. He had dropped me and married her. I was left with all the memories and an immense amount of love for a man that had been playing me since day one. I won't lie and say that I didn't cry for weeks. I thought something was wrong with me. I felt like I was owed some sort of explanation. I was searching for closure.
Fun fact: YOU DON'T NEED TO SEE YOUR EX TO GET CLOSURE.
I thought I needed to be face to face with him as he explained his reasons for doing what he did. I wanted him to see my heart breaking. I wanted him to forever have the image of me crying my eyes out in front of him burned into his mind. I couldn't change him, but I thought if he saw just how broken I was, he'd change on his own.
Turns out, all I needed was some time away from him and to realize that he isn't ever coming back.
My mother said it best, "He is keeping you hooked because he feels that he needs a backup and every time you give him the time of day, he knows you'll keep going back. You have to put your foot down and tell him you're not a backup. You're not a side piece. You are worth so much more than that."
I should have left when the calls started, but I thought I loved him and I thought he loved me. Ladies, don't let these men fool you. Just because his pecker is magical, he cooks for you, and showers you with gifts DOES NOT MEAN HE REALLY LOVES YOU.
Stay woke. Pay attention to your men, ladies.