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Finding out you are herpes positive can be scary. Dating someone and telling them the situation can be even scarier.
Luckily, there are many herpes dating sites and herpes groups, where people with herpes don’t need to worry about how to tell a potential partner that you are living with herpes.
Member’s condition is open and clear in such herpes sites and groups. Herpes people can find that they can talk with others and be themselves without the tension.
But for dating with someone who doesn’t have herpes, the most important thing is honesty. Be honest with your potential partner.
If you are looking for a serious relationship and a life-long partner, do you need to tell them on the first date that you are herpes positive?
Actually, it is not necessary to tell them on the first date, unless you plan to have sex with them that night. A one night stand is rare for a serious relationship.
Some people may think why? You just said “honest!” Let's re-think. Do you want to tell a stranger that you are living with herpes?
At least, you need to take one/two dates to know whether the people you are dating is someone you are interested in romantically. And whether you want to have a long-term relationship with him/her.
It’s different from the casual relationship. It’s about a relationship with love, respect, responsibility.
But if you found no gut for the people on the first date, no need to tell them since you won’t have any further contact with them.
What’s more, both of you will have more chances to know each other better without revealing such kind of personal situation. There is no prejudices and discrimination.
Just as we mentioned earlier, it’s very important to tell someone the situation before you have sexual contact. But on the first date, you can’t even confirm that he or she will call you again, or be interested in another date.
Living with herpes is not the end of the world.
Your potential partner should want to know who you are and what you like, not what conditions you have.
Actually, both of you will have the chance to learn more about each other if you don’t reveal such personal information on a first date. Then that person won’t have any ideas or prejudices for you.
As we mentioned before, it’s important to tell that person the truth before any sexual contact. But you can’t even confirm whether he or she will call you again, or be interested in another date. They should want to know who you are and what you like, not what you have.
So go out and enjoy the first date without pressure. Just be yourself. If that person really wants another date because of the real you, then you need to consider when and how to tell them that you are living with herpes.
We all know that it will be embarrassing to explain to someone the condition. But most importantly, please remember that they want to see you again because they like you.
It’s their loss if they can’t understand and prepare to leave someone special like you. It’s your luck to leave a pressure and unstable relationship.
Don’t doubt yourself. You are a good person. You are not alone. There are much more things we can dedicate to the world. We all deserve the best.