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Dear 13-Year-Old Me,
Oh, how you’ve changed. You’re not going to believe the places that you have been to, or the people you have seen. Your life is going to be so different to how you planned it. You want stardom and all of the riches the world can offer, but you will soon realise just what it means to have all of things you could ever dream of, and it will be far different to anything you’re imagining right now.
I want you to be ready for all of the amazing things that you are going to experience, but I also want you to be prepared for the painful parts to. So, here goes…
Hold Onto the Friendships That Matter
But also be ready to let go of those that you simply do not need anymore. It will be hard to do that so be ready to break your own heart to make progress in your life. The first rule you need to follow with this is to ignore how long a friend has been around, but instead look at whether they are helping or hindering you now. And I don’t mean that you should turn your back on someone purely because you do not talk very much anymore though that is a mistake that you will make more than once, and you will regret it, but sometimes people simply outgrow one another, and that’s okay. You don’t need to force a friendship for the sake of holding on. Wish them well and let them go. It will be better for you both in the long run. You will continue to watch these friends from a distance and cheer them on from the side lines, that won’t ever stop, but you will feel a sense of relief when you finally decide to go your own way.
Trust Your Instincts
Even when your instincts are telling you something that you do not want to hear. The friend that you think has been lying to you? She will, and she does. You will get over it, but do not be afraid to go with your instincts and ask her about it. She will be angry at first, and she will probably ignore you for a little while too, but the truth will come out in time, and you will sort out your differences. Never be too scared to question things. It will get you out of a few very difficult situations.
You will love him.
But you will have to let him go. At this point, you have never been in love. You are sat there waiting for someone to come and sweep you off your feet so that you can live the romance you have always wanted. Be prepared for heartbreak along the way. You will feel love, and you will think that you have everything you have ever wanted with him, but you are young and love does not always last. You will argue and you will fight. When that fighting ends, walk away, because after the fighting will come a horrendous silence where you have both just accepted that this is how life is now. Don’t. Don’t accept that. You are both worth so much more. He is a wonderful guy, and you were lucky to have him as your first love, but let him go. It will feel like the world has come crashing down, and everything will hurt for a while, but it gets better. He will fall in love again, and so will you. And, oh, how it feels the second time around…
Don’t be too scared to love him.
He will ground you; he will make you feel again; he will teach you how to trust and love even when it seems impossible to do so. He will be your best friend and you will not be expecting him to turn your world upside down but he will. Let him. There will be no better feeling in the world than the moment he finally admits that he’s in love with you. He will make you question everything but you will start to understand how it feels to be crazily in love. It’s amazing, and wonderful, and everything you’re dreaming of and so much more. It will hit you in the most unexpected way, but don’t be scared of it and if you are scared, please don’t let the fear control it. Let your inhibitions go and love him. Love him with everything you have inside of you. It will be worth every second.
Learn to Forgive
People make mistakes. We’re only human! Don’t let those mistakes control you. You need to learn to forgive people when they hurt you and when they mess up. Forgiving someone is hard, it will take a lot of strength from you and a lot of control, but letting go of the things that have been eating you inside will lessen your burden. These things will hold you back and slow you down if you hold onto them for too long. Learn to forgive, but never forget. Learn from the mistakes that other people have made. And more importantly, forgive yourself and learn from your own mistakes. Forgiving yourself is important. After all, you’re only human too.
Never Underestimate Your Strength
You’re going to be amazed at the things that you are going to pull through. You don’t feel strong right now and you won’t feel that way for a very long time, but one day you will wake up and suddenly realise how strong you are. Your strength is awe-inspiring. Never let anyone break your strength. There is not a single person worth breaking for.
You are going to question every aspect of your life, you are going to face fear and you will wonder whether you are going to get through the tough times. You are going to get through it all. So, 13-year-old me… hold your head up high and soldier on. You’re destined for huge things.