Did He/She 'Ghost' You?

Sometimes people just disappear from our live without saying "Goodbye." It can happen to anyone really. This situation can trigger lots of negative feelings and thoughts. We tend to feel guilty and try to find what we might have done "wrong" to upset that person.

It is natural to feel sad and disappointed, especially if you were already having feelings for this person. It is really important to look after yourself and keep positive.

Casual relationships

When you just meet someone casually, like a "one night stand." In this situation, we shouldn't expect ANYTHING more than that. If there was a connection between both people, it is natural that you are going to keep in touch with each other. However, if you created an expectation about someone you saw for a few hours, this is entirely your responsibility. You are setting yourself up for frustration. The other person has absolutely nothing to do with and no obligation to fulfill your expectation.

or...

You meet someone and there was a connection. You both decide to get to know each other and going out for some dates. After some time, a month, for example, he/she disappeared from the "map." No calls, no texts or replies.

Players

Exactly the same as above BUT he/she made promises and "plans" with you since you started dating. They appear to be seriously interested on you. Comments such as "Can we go for a little trip by ocean?", "I will cook a dinner for you one day," and "I can help you with this and that" are often heard during conversations.

That hurts

You are actually in "formal" relationship. You have been together for some time. Maybe 6 months, one year or 10 years! Nowadays, it is not easy to define what "relationship" is, but here we go: you feel an emotional connection between both of you; you spend lots of time together, most of the weekends; you know each others' family and friends; you make future plans together. One day he/she gone! No calls, no texts no replies. That's hard!

Recovering

You will get through it and keep feeling good about yourself: make this decision. Now. Go to the mirror, look into your eyes and say to yourself how special and valuable you are. If somebody cannot see it, it's their problem, not yours.

Do not overthink

Do not spend too much time trying to understand the other person's "head." Sometimes people do not even know why they do what they do. The reason why they did it can be anything or a combination of many factors, and you probably will never find out. What is happening in the other person's mind is not important at this moment for you. How you are feeling and thinking are important. It is always good to do a self-reflection, but don't overthink; it's a waste of time.

Do not try to contact the person

It's okay to call or text once or twice, but no more than that. Trying to force people to do what they do not want to will only push them away from you. Put yourself in their position. You don't like when someone keeps insisting when you are not interested, right? This is actually very disrespectful. Also, you look desperate, and this is definitely not attractive at all.

Talk to someone

Ask for help if you need it. We should not be ashamed to ask for help. This is maturity. Talking to a good friend or even a psychologist can help. When we talk, we organise our thoughts better.

Look after yourself

Have a list of things you enjoy to do and make you happy, such as going for dancing, running or a little trip. Getting yourself busy with what you love will accelerate the healing process.

Don't be afraid to love again

There are 7 billion people in the word, move on. Everyone is different, so give another go to love when you feel ready. Time will help a lot in your healing process, just be patient.

When we try anything, we are putting ourselves at risk. Things can go wrong, sometimes we make poor choices, we get wounded and so on, that's life. We always get stronger when we rebuild ourselves and there is always something to learn if we look into it carefully.