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You've been single for a while. You're vibrant, ambitious, goal oriented. You're out living your best life not looking for anything in particular. You go on dates, but to you it seems like all the good men in your town are taken. And then it happens! A seemingly perfect man is interested in you. Maybe you meet him at a party. Maybe you meet him at work. It doesn't matter where you meet him. All that matters is he's perfect to you.
He showers you with attention. Text messages daily, phone calls, flowers, and chocolates just because. He's incredibly charming and charismatic. He has won over friends and family. He's a great listener, and you feel like you can tell him anything. You wonder how it is that you can deserve a man so incredibly perfect. He makes you feel so safe, until the day he doesn't.
At first you don't notice that he's slowly gaining control of your entire life. It's starts out with little things, making you change before you leave the house, and telling you to stop being friends with a person because he doesn't think they are good enough for you. You will do anything to please this perfect man so you comply with any request with little to no resistance, until the day comes when fighting becomes the norm.
He picks fights like it's a sport. Heck, in his mind it probably is a sport, and he is a professional. You guys will fight about you spending time with family and friends. You will fight about money. You will fight about your wardrobe. You will fight about household chores. You will even fight about small things like a tv show or a book. But you will never be a worthy opponent to him. He will always win, but you will continue to try and get your point across, until the day you stop fighting.
The day the Narcissist has been waiting for is finally here — the day when your will to fight is gone. And that day will come. Instead of going through the arguing you'll start to do anything to not fight. It's tiring to you, emotionally, and mentally.You will comply with whatever he says no matter how crazy the request would seem to an outsider looking in.
Your brain has now kicked into survival mode just not in the way that makes sense. You start to think the way he want you too. You will black hole friends and family because they would start to see him for what he is. You will dress the way he wants you to because you would never show what is his to the world. You will cook and clean the way he wants you to because he works hard, and of course you want to please your man. Your life will become his.
You shrink into a shell of your former self. There are moments when you come to your senses and realize that nothing he does is okay. But those thoughts are like feathers in the wind. And you would never be able to leave him. He's broken you down, and has made you believe you would be nothing without him.
Falling for a Narcissistic Sociopath feels like a dream at first. You think, "How could this perfect man love me?" You try your best to please him, and you do whatever you can to keep him. Even when it's unbearable with the constant fighting, you love him through it. You think about the perfect life you both will have once you get past all your differences, until the day the ground shatters at your feet.