Flame

I wonder around, empty and broken. Numb to those around me. Darkness flows through the crowded streets as I walk aimlessly andblindly. I wonder if you are in as much pain as I am. If you are as confused, hurt and ashamed as me. Ashamed to think that we would last. Ashamed that we didn't see the distance between us. And ashamed for not trying. Not trying hard enough to make it work, not trying enough to listen to each others words, or not caring enough to try at all.

The blank expression on my face was drowned in the emotionless and questioning stares that were being passed onto me. As each person passed, I began to wonder if they felt the same unattached feelings as I did. I was silently praying that at least one of these unfamiliar faces held a shred of hope that it does gets better. I looked for the familiar hurt and pained eyes that have been staring back at me in the mirror since that horrid day. That day that changed everything, my thought, my beliefs, and most importantly my view of life.

But as the inexpressive faces kept passing, I realized that in this moment I am the most alone than I have ever been before. It did not matter that I was surrounded by hundreds of people, the shared cold and detached faces were enough for me to understand that in this big world, I am simply a tiny speck of unexplained theories waiting to be proven.

As I walk down this dark and chilling street, I catch a glimpse of a spark. A distant light that seems to be reaching out to me. As the light gets brighter, the people around me start to disappear as I focus on this mysterious pull. Once I reached the light, time seemed to stop and my once blank face was now filled with countless emotions.

A wave of feelings, desires, and illustrations flowed through me as my happiness was once again reignited. The flame burned with such a passion and fever that I felt the a spark ignite in my body. I was once again brought back to my days of love, tenderness, and comfort that were once left behind, now fully present in my soul.

The flame continued to grow, and my spirit lifted with it. I never wanted this feeling to end, so when the flame reached out to me, I accepted it with a open arms. It was then when I realized that this flame held such and important role in my life, it kept me grounded, and it kept me sane. It kept me sparkling and overall content. As I looked deeper into the heart of the flame, it started to shift.

In that moment in time I knew that it wasn't the flame that kept me stable, it wasn't the light that kept me sane, it was you. You were the one. The one who could keep me from losing my mind, you were the one who accepted me when society didn't. You loved me for who I am, not for who I pretended to be.

As I stare into this light, I am filled with gratitude. I want to thank you for being there for me, for saving me, for loving me, and for helping me love myself.

You saved me from my worst enemy. You turned my dark thoughts into a beautiful flame. This flame helped me burn bright and as I continue to grow, I will hold this flame in my heart forever.The flame will burn brighter than ever now that I have been lifted from the dark hole I have been spiraling down.

I've done it. I reached the end, the end of the road. The darkness that once clouded my vision, has been replaced by a bright light that will never fade, not now, not ever.