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During the times of starting and owning new ventures and journeys in life, it’s very hard to discern who’s really in your corner. Some are out just to use you, others are to help you, but how do we really decide on who is for us and who is not? I come from a big city that full of ambitious people willing to make their dreams happen even if they have little to nothing. The discernment of finding a friend process is a journey in itself because not only do YOU have to be put together as far as your life, but you have to make sure that the other person can handle themselves and the friendship as well.
Some people are industry friends, some are hometown friends, and the others are associates, but let’s focus on the “friend” portion of this article. Friends, in my definition, are supposed to be there when you’re happy and sad, with the understanding that you also have a life and they have a life as well. I’ve noticed one day I seen two people arguing who called themselves “friends” and the while one was being a concerned friend—kind of found out that the other party was stabbing him behind his back and not reciprocating the level of friendship they thought they had. But while the one was crying about the friendship, he was also doing dirt as well. I’m not trying to say that they were just surviving, but where did the love go? Personally, I feel that a person can come into your life right when you’re about to come into something and try to snatch it all away in an instant, not realizing how one friend has hurt the other.
Moral of the story: you should always use your level of discernment to decipher who’s for you.
These are my top five ways to tell if you have a friend.
- When they understand that you’re not going to talk every day, let alone all day. We all have personal issues and battles that we face every day, whether it be kids, a family, or parents. So if that other party doesn’t understand that, then I guess something has to happen—it may not end up good depending on the level of friendship. Choose wisely.
- Are they going to love you like their own kids? When life comes unexpectedly, “friends” do things unexpectedly and it comes as a shock because it’s a big change. I’ve known people since high school and thought we were “gone with the wind fabulous” together. Turns out, as soon as my life turned different, I looked left then I looked right and the only thing I saw was handguns by a string, ready to break. So keep wise on who holds a strong cord in your life.
- Go hungry! Many of times when friends run out of resources, they disappear like magic. Like where did the friendship go? If they don’t care about your food, then it’s bye bye time.
- Go broke! Now this goes without saying, of course, no one is going to fully support your lifestyle but if they “watch you go broke,” let alone you stay around and let yourself go broke, you have to ask yourself; were you even a friend to yourself? Marinate on that.
- Be loyal to yourself! The key thing about this is if someone jumped off the bridge, would you do it with them? I think not. The end. Hugs and kisses until next story, peace.