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Getting out of an Abusive Relationship

My Story and a Couple of Tips

I remember being 15 and enjoying school and living my life. I had no cares in the world and I was always with my friends and going to Quinceaneras.

I was sitting at home one day when I got a friend request from a guy that I thought was cute. He liked my "Tbh" post and I messaged him and did a tbh, he responded back and from there we started talking every day.

Throughout the course from November to March, he was always leaving me to be with other girls and would always come back. Me, being in love with him and all, I took him back. 

I found out I was pregnant in January and I told him but all he had to say was, "I'm not ready to be a father," so I decided to just do things on my own. In February I had a miscarriage and I found out it was because I was too depressed to do anything. That same day I find out the guy I was seeing had started dating someone else.  

I remember feeling really upset about both losing my baby and him leaving me that I resulted in swallowing a bunch of pills. Around ten at night my best friend took me to the ER to get my stomach pumped. 

After being in crisis under suicide watch for four days, I was finally able to get home and let me tell you that I felt a lot better about myself.

A month later in April, he came back and I took him back for the last time, and this time he was treating me a lot better, and never once texted a girl or left me.

In May I found out I was pregnant again and I ended up moving in with him.

Over the course of my pregnancy, everything started going well. It wasn't until I was about three months pregnant when he first slapped me. Then the second time he punched me on the forehead and then on my eye.

The fourth time I was trying to pack my things and leave when he came in the room and we started arguing, so when I started defending myself he started to push me and tackle me until I was on the ground and when I went to grab the pole on the bed he started to slap me and pull my hair. This time his friend and his brothers were in the living room watching our one-month-old daughter. None of them tried to stop him from hitting me.

He stopped after a while but kept on calling me names. He used my past against me, started saying bad things about my family and pointed out my flaws knowing it would affect me.

My family was telling me to leave and asking me why I'm still with him and all I could say was, "I love him." 

Two years of us being together and it was as if he got worse and was calling me names all day every day.

My last couple days of Senior year we were arguing with each other and he had said something about my mom and saying I was just like her and I lost it. I pushed him and he swung and punched me on my mouth causing my lip to swell up. 

I went to school the next day with a busted lip telling everyone that I fell and slipped on ice. 

I am now 18 years old, a high school graduate, and a freshman in college. I have my own place and have full custody of my daughter. 

I ended up getting two jobs and saving up the money to get my own place. I saved pictures of my busted lip on Dropbox just in case he took me to court and he did. 

His urine test came back negative and that helped my case a little bit. I was the only parent who had a job and went to school so he lost the case.

If you're in a domestic violence relationship I suggest you take pictures of all the bruises and cuts or anything he/she has done to you and report every incident that has happened.

  • Never and I mean NEVER isolate yourself from your family. They're gonna be the people you need most when you leave that relationship. 
  • Don't depend on anyone in their family to help you because they won't. They will do anything to keep their family out of jail.
  • PACK and LEAVE when they're not home. It'll keep you safe from getting beat. Also if they stay home every day like mine did, Call the police and tell them that you're trying to leave from a domestic relationship and you're afraid you might get beat for leaving.
  • Go to your local county building and ask for resources in helping to get your own place.
  • Save up your money. You're going to need it.
  • Don't let the abuser put you down with their words or let them use things against you to get you to stay. I did that and it got me nowhere but to get mentally abused.

Don't forget your worth. Never let a low life make you feel less than you are. You are a beautiful human being and you're strong for being strong in that relationship and please don't wait three years to get out of an abusive relationship! It could be very dangerous for you.

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