Groceries, Ignorance, and Logicality

I felt the need to share this with someone, so after sharing it with some friends, they recommended posting my story online, so here we go.

I was going to the local grocery store with my boyfriend, Patton, since, even though we had our normal food essentials at home, he wanted to bake, and I wanted to help out. Here's the thing, for anyone that asks, I trust Patton to find the necessary ingredients for baking or cooking, but he has the urge to, well, splurge on enough sweets to make the cart burst. And before anyone who sees this and knows me calls me a hypocrite, Crofters is much healthier than what puts Patton in a trance.

Anyway, due to a force of habit, I gave Patton rules to follow the list exactly, and meet me back by the jams, so I can inspect him, and the cart, for anything I need to put back. He kissed me, and I went off to browse the aisle. I wasn't looking to buy anything at that point, just an aisle to spark my habit: organizing the groceries on the shelves, and hopefully making it easier for shoppers, employees that couldn't care less about their jobs, or the employees who don't want to be stressed during their jobs.

As I was finishing as much as I could with organizing the shelves, I kept hearing the sound of someone clear their throat behind me more than once. I figured they were looking for someone else, so I just made my way to the jams. Once I was a few steps away, though, I heard an angry voice shout "Excuse me!" which caused me to turn around to ask the shouter to keep it down, until I noticed an older woman staring angrily towards me.

"Ugh, finally! I've been trying to get your attention many times! Direct me to the pickles at once!"

I looked around me to see if there was anyone else she could ask.

"Um, excuse me, I'm sure there's probably someone who works here that can help you, but I-"

"No excuses! You were organizing the shelves, so you clearly work here!"

I wasn't in the mood for verbal arguments, so I just scrolled through my phone for a particular comic made by a fellow aspie. You see, I have a method developed that whenever someone asks me why I randomly organize shelves in a store, I just show them a comic on my phone of a girl with Asperger's Syndrome doing the same thing, and hope they have enough sense and understanding to connect the figurative dots. Unfortunately, as I pulled out my phone to execute the method, the lady slapped the phone out of my hand.

"You need to stay off that phone of yours, and do your job! You know what customer service means? Let me get it through your hearing-impaired ears: THE CUSTOMER IS ALWAYS RIGHT!"

I would've rubbed my ears due to the pain they were experiencing, but I didn't want to give the lady satisfaction. I saw an employee walk toward us, and question the situation. I explained to the best of my ability, while the lady kept attempting to interrupt me. I walked to pick up my phone, while the employee was trying to tell the lady that he and I were clearly not wearing the same article of clothing. I was so focused on the migraine I was developing at that point that I could no longer pay attention to the lady's tirade.

Eventually, I saw Patton approaching the jams with the cart, and did something that I figured would at the very least annoy the lady judging by her estimated age and ignorance: as Patton asked what was going on, I walked over to him, held him, and immediately kissed him passionately in front of the lady, and the employee. I didn't see her reaction, but I heard her shout "I'll find those damn pickles myself! Better than you tainting them anyway!" When I pulled away, Patton was surprised, and the employee apologized for her behavior before going to see the manager. I explained as much as I could to Patton while inspecting his cart, and I said "Don't worry. I'll kiss you like that again when we're in a private area," before winking at him.

Once we got to a check out line, we saw the lady being shoved out by security, as she was screaming about lazy millennials and gays tainting the food supply.