How It Feels to Grow Out of Your Binder

Growing out of your binder can be a discouraging moment in your transitioning journey. Whether it be from growing older or gaining weight it can still be an irritating moment when you realize your binder no longer fits.

It may be hard to realize you have grown out of the binder. Some signs are shortness of breath, soreness, and dizziness, so be sure to be aware of how you feel in your binder.

Growing out of your binder can tap negatively into your self esteem. It may make you feel as if you're too overweight to be happy. It may make you feel like you're not worthy of the binder you worked hard to pay for. It may even cause feelings of being overwhelmed for needing to buy a new one.

It took me a few months to realize the size of my binder was incorrect. I assumed it was my asthma making me uncomfortable. Then after a quick look at a sizing chart, I realized I was wearing a binder of the wrong size by three sizes. I didn’t know what to do. I panicked knowing I was going to need one by the end of the month. I needed one for a wedding or else I wouldn’t be comfortable in my suit.

I did everything I could at the time. I bought a new snug sports bra to see if it helped, signed up for survey sites, asked for money. You name it. But as a unemployed trans man living at his dads’ house, there wasn’t much I could do, save for post my old binder on my blog and save it for another trans person who needed it.

Nothing happened for a long while besides dysphoria for ages. Dysphoria can be so incredible discouraging when you don’t have things that can help. I would change clothes constantly trying to find something that would fit right with an undersized sports bra that compressed well but didn’t feel fantastic. I could always try sewing something up, but there would be no guarantee it’d be safe for my ribs.

That’s the thing about binders: if you want to keep your chest and lungs safe then you need to use a proper one, though when you can’t afford one it can be such an awful feeling. You don’t feel worth having one that fits you after you’ve grown out of one. It can cause such anxiety about not having the means to get one. Just everything about it can feel dreadful.

There was the option to wear the too-small one but it came with the risk of passing out due to lack of breath, but even that had to feel better than dysphoria? Not really, it was so uncomfortable to even just sit around in it. Something had to be done and quick. At least, that’s how it felt. But sometimes the waiting game is all you get. When you do get that binder after waiting for so long, it is one of the most incredible feelings, almost making all that hurt worth it. The feeling is fantastic and almost cathartic. Putting on a new-fitting binder is wonderful. Even almost getting stuck can be exciting know that it will keep you healthy in the size it is.

Though as an after note, it is useful to keep track of how you may be growing for the healthy use of binders as well as staying aware of how they make you feel.

A quick reminder is that no matter what shape or size of person you are, you are still valid and deserve to wear a binder that fits and is comfortable.