How to Make Long Distance Work

Everyone knows that long distance isn't as easy as it appears to be in the films and books. It's actually a lot of feeling lonely and disappointment. Although, once you've learnt to accept that, you can see the good it does for you. I understand that every relationship is different and these tips I'm about to suggest may not work for everyone, however, I personally have found these helpful for myself. So lets jump straight into it.

1 - Make the most out of Facetime.

Now this may see obvious, but if your lucky like me, you'll be in the same time zone. Now this can become more difficult when time zones are all over the place and it's disturbing your sleeping pattern. Over the summer, I was in France, whilst my boyfriend was in Canada. This has like a seven hour time difference, and I found myself waiting up for him and waking up early just to chat. Even though this may not be ideal, I valued the time more. Now we're in the same time zone it's much easier, we just Facetime in the evenings after his work.

2 - It's okay to feel lonely.

Accepting this was one of the most eye opening experiences for me. When I first started university, all my friends started coupling up. And it left me feeling alone, because those of them who had partners from home seemed to see their's more than I saw mine. For the first few months, I felt so lonely and run down, but once I finally learnt to accept it's okay, I started to feel better. I made friends with people who didn't see their partners as much, which allowed me to get away from the boyfriend and girlfriend-obsessed drama. You also learn to enjoy your alone time more. I've started to treasure sit alone in my room, reading and writing.

3 - Learn to accept disappointment.

Not that my relationship is disappointing, but when you're at university, you spend a lot of time alone and at home. While your partner is working full-time. I spent a lot of time planning and hoping that he'd come down and surprise me, however, this is where we have to stop comparing ourselves to movies. Realistically, they won't be able to get time off. My boyfriend planned to come and see me for our anniversary, however, his work wouldn't allow him to have it off, so it was disappointing. Once you've learnt to accept that this will happen, you're on the right track to keeping your relationship working.

4 - One of you will have to put in more effort.

This was something my mum warned me about. My dad and her went long distance for a year, and she told me without her keeping the relationship going it wouldn't have lasted. And this carries on to this day, I have to put in more effort. Even though it can be infuriating, it's something you just do when you love someone. Once you learn to accept that's your role in the relationship, it becomes so much easier and you accept that you have to look after the plans.

5 - It has to be the right person.

No one ever considers that they're with the wrong person. But long distance can really show you if it's them or not. You get to meet so many people who don't know your story and that's how you know. Do you feel a spark with someone else? If yes, then you don't want to keep the long distance going. It's way too much effort for the wrong person. If you or your partner are cheating or having a connection with someone else, leave before it becomes a task.

Here are five tips I have for people in long distance relationships.