I Needed Someone Like You...

When I was a little girl, I was bullied; bullied for what I looked like, bullied for the way my face was, for how fat I was. People always said the meanest words to me. Being called a pig, a cow, poison, because I had freckles. I was a nobody to them. Forty four kids called me names and bullied me on a daily basis. It was hard and difficult to deal with.

I had no friends; no one liked me, no one spoke to me. So for many years it was me against them.

When I finished primary school, which in my country is until you're 12 years old, after that you can attend middle school. Which I did for four years. I was happy—there were no longer any bullies in my class. Well, that was a joke... I was bullied again. I got good grades a lot. I was top of my class, so I was being kicked, clothes washed under a sink during gym class, and my head was put down in a toilet. Words I heard everyday: Fat pig, ugly, handicapped shitperson, worthless piece of crap, hope you fucking die you pig. I can go on and on, but you should still get my point. For the four years I was there, no one stood up for me, no one cared, I had two friends, and four people who used me for their own personal gain.

During that time the only friends I had were my plushy stuffed animals. I told them stories, my dreams, my desires, my perfect life, everything... it was all I ever had... I didn’t know love, I only knew them.

So this year—during the one year I studied at art school but then got kicked out... due to problems with my internship, which was done at the school—I was bullied the worst... I designed Knuf as I call him/her. It’s a stuffed animal created to one day be the creature that will help kids to be able to tell their stories. With Knuf I hope I can accomplish this, and create something for kids to make them feel better, to see them for who they are, and for them to be stronger. I needed a Knuf back then, had I had one, I wouldn’t have been the way I am now, I would have been stronger.

I hope one can be inspired by this, and I hope that you will one day create something more, or help me further develop Knuf.

With greetings,

Simy