Is An Open Relationship Right For Me?

Relationships were not always one man and one woman. Polygamy and open marriages have been around since all of recorded history but began to die out with the spread of non-political marriages and Christianity. However, after several centuries of recluse they have returned, causing many new couples to wonder if an open relationship is right for them, and if so where to start. This can be really difficult with the term "open relationship" having no set ground rules or meanings. One couple may have sex outside of marriage only if both partners know and are involved, while another couple may have free reign with no rules. This broad span of rules and meanings can cause for a ton of confusion, judgment, and even jealousy. More then that, peer judgement can make a newly opened relationship extremely difficult to put into practice.

On one hand an open relationship can be freeing and strengthen a relationship beyond what it could or would be closed. When I began my relationship it started open, with very strict guidelines as to what was okay and what wasn't. As a woman it made me feel powerful, exquisite, and beautiful to be able to see my now husband have the freedom to have sex with whomever he wanted, yet still want and at times beg for me. It gave me a whole new level of self respect to know that there were ways I could please him emotionally and sexually that other women could not, and boosted the amount of trust I have in my husband. In addition to the emotional gains to the relationship, there were also physical gains. The amount of sexual versatility and experimentation that came due the relationship being open was tripled what it would have been without. Unlike all my previous relationships there is no sexual boredom or run of the mill intercourse. Every time is a new and different experience.

However, that is not the experience everyone gets. Some people are forced into an open relationship and it causes animosity, distrust, and jealousy. In other situations the guidelines set are either too strict or not strict enough for both partners to get the best out of an open relationship. Another issue that commonly arises is the transition from closed to open. The killer of an open relationship? The same thing that kills a closed one: distrust, lack of communication, and jealousy. That being said it takes a very high level of trust in your partner and yourself to even consider an open relationship. While it can be freeing, it can also be a double edged sword and amplify any issues that may have already be present in a relationship.

So is an open relationship right for you? That all depends on your own beliefs. If its something you have to talk yourself or your partner into, then turn back now because it is not the right option for you. If you have trust or communication issues in the relationship already, then starting an open relationship may only make then worse in the long run. However, if you are both ready and willing to take a new and innovative plunge into a new and exciting lifestyle then yes it may be right for you. Do not be fooled though, an open relationship is a totally different ball game from a closed one. There will be new and different trials that a closed monogamous relationship does not have, and there are also certain trails that a closed relationship has that will not be present at all in an open relationship. No matter what, remember that when it comes to any relationship, closed or open, that communication is a vital factor.