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I live in a community called Hope Gardens. But is it really?
The community consists of all woman and their children, but I have started to notice a few things since living there that are really starting to get on my nerves.
These people call themselves Christians and are run by a bunch of supposed churchgoers.
I have been there for almost a year now. But there is a few problems that have come to my attention.
The staff that runs the place like to play favorites.
Most of the woman there are either hispanic or black, and the staff only ever interact with those families.
There are a few white families but not many.
It seems like if you are not a recovering addict or you haven't had your kids taken by the state they don't really care about you too much.
Most of them never come to talk to my self or my child. About four staff out of fifteen actually speak to us on a regular basis.
Most of them don't acknowledge us or even say hi.
This is a real problem for me!
I use to be friendly and nice to all of them. I even made all the staff Christmas presents.
Most of them, after Christmas, never even came and said thank you for what I made.
How can you call your self-good Christian people and say you believe in god when you sure don't act like it?
I have noticed the hypocrisy that goes on and I am trying to bite my tongue a lot of the time about it but it is hard when I see it happen every day around me.
I have become withdrawn and anti-social towards most of them because of this.
I was recently going through a depression and not a single one of them took notice and said anything or asked me if I was ok.
If I have a question most of them shut me down before I even get the question all the way out. They don't just do it to me either they do it to my child as well.
You can not claim to be a place of hope when the people there do not feel that hope because of everyone around them.
How can you call it a community when people don't act like it?
Just because you have a town hall and a church service once a week isn't going to fix the deeper lying problem there is in the place.
Some times I feel like I live in a sea of people but I am still very much alone.
I understand a lot of these people feel the same way. It isn't the families that are the problem though. It is the staff running the place that is the major problem.
I have been fighting against my first instinct, and that is to flee from the place that is causing me pain.
It has been really hard for me not to, especially when I am trying to get things right for my daughter and myself.
How can I though when I feel like I have no support from people who claim they are there for support?
I just can not decide what to do. I know it is best for us to stay. Should I just suck it up and deal with this for another year?
Or should I collect what I can and get my ducks in a row quicker than get out as fast as I can?
I am just not sure anymore.
What would any of you do in my place?