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Is Power Play in a Relationship Worth It?

If you're newly in love you might be wondering, is power play in a relationship worth it? The answer, in most cases, is complicated.

Photo by Brooke Winters on Unsplash

Power is defined as the ability or right to control people or things. We’ve all heard the saying "he wears the pants" to refer to a man who basically holds all the "power" in a relationship. But I always say…the best relationships are the ones where no one is wearing pants. But all kidding aside, to maintain a healthy relationship there must be a delicate balance of power. Each party involved should feel the freedom to truly be themselves and that their opinions and concerns matter. Everyone has something that they are good at, and the best partnerships work together as a team, acknowledging each other's strengths and weaknesses. So you want to have a balanced relationship? I’ve got a few ideas on how you might get there…

For Women

Photo by Brooke Cagle on Unsplash

1. Make your own money.

Ladies, I hate to say it, but the minute you take money from a man, you are giving away your power. Like it or not, the longer that this kind of scenario goes on, the less power you will have. Make your own money and live within your means.

2. Don’t be afraid to be alone.

Too many women will stay in controlling relationships because they are too afraid to be alone. But I promise you, being single is better than being with Mr. Wrong. Do activities that will boost your self-esteem…you don’t need him!

3. Walk away.

The women with the most power in relationships are the ones that are truly willing to walk away the moment their man steps out of line. These women don’t just threaten it…they do it. Oh, and the men they’re with know it. LATER!

For Men

Photo by Rahul Anil on Unsplash

1. Flex those muscles.

Women love it when their man is strong and protects them. Our feminine nature insists that we feel safe and protected. Guys, make sure you hit the gym so that you really are strong…muscles are really sexy. Plus, what woman doesn’t love to be thrown up against the wall and…?

2. Not those muscles.

Men are conditioned by society to be "in charge" and many seem to get off on having so much power. Consistently exerting control over your lady, you will slowly erode any respect she has for you. She may not say anything…but she will definitely be keeping score.

3. Her opinion matters.

Your thought process may be a little like this: I’m the one with the PhD over here. I’m the one that makes more money. It’s my money, why can’t I decide how it’s spent? If that’s you, then my question is, "Um, WHY are you in a relationship?" Seriously. Every man needs to know that women are very smart, intuitive creatures…You really should at least take a moment to hear her out. I’m sure you’ve heard the quote “Behind every great man there stands a great woman.” Well, that’s because it’s true.

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