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It's Okay That We're Not Best Friends Anymore

A Letter to My Former Best Friend

Dear Former Best Friend,

Since we were 13 years old you have been my very best friend, my sister, my person. But sadly, lately that just hasn't been the case. It took me a long time to come to this and I'm so sorry it had to be this way, but I want you to know that it's okay that we aren't best friends anymore. It's okay because we are not the same people we were when we were 13 years old. Our 8 year long friendship might be coming to a close, but its okay and let me tell you why. 

When I was 13 years old I started at a brand new school as a freshman in high school. The few friends that had come with me from middle school were put into different classes and lunches as me. So I really did have to start all over. My favorite class all through high school was where I met you. My very best friend:) You were quirky and weird just like me and we were drawn to each other. That very first day we ever hung out, I will never forget. I remember thinking I was glad that I had made this friend and that I knew we were going to be best friends forever. We were pretty much inseparable every day after that.

The next four years of high school flew by, but not without our fair share of fights and friendship breakups. We were polar opposite. I was a rebel child and still am. You were (and you know I mean this in the nicest way possible) a good-two-shoes. I challenged your fun side and you helped me stay out of too much trouble. Sometimes it went too extreme and you tried to "fix" me. Those times were the times we fought the most. 

As we entered college and went our separate ways, it was like you did a full 540 degrees circle around me. I knew we were growing up and maturing and beginning to really define ourselves, but what I didn't know was that instead of growing together, you were going to completely change into someone I couldn't relate to anymore. Someone who didn't believe the same things as me or want the similar things as me. Someone who didn't feel comfortable enough to share with me their most darkest secrets. Which, isn't that something best friends do? I was your person, but you were not mine and I need a person too. Some people think that this might just be a phase we're going through and some people think we're just growing apart. It's taken me a really long time to realize this, but I've decided to stop beating myself up over it and just accept the fact that my best friend is no longer my best friend. 

I tried so hard day after day to be the best friend that you needed. I was there for you always, I listened to you, and helped you, brought you food when you were sad, took you out when you wanted to dance, helped you through your difficult times, and always made you feel special and loved. When not all of those things were reciprocated, I began to really look at our friendship. I took a lot of time thinking about the last 8 years and all the ups and downs we'd had. I decided that in order to be truly happy, for BOTH of us to be truly happy, it was time for me to take a step back. I can't always be there for, especially when you were not always there for me. 

Now, this is by no means a dig at you or meant to hurt you. This is me expressing my feelings and sadly on top of all that we have just drifted apart. AND THAT'S OKAY. You've made new friends, and hopefully you made some friends that want the same things as you or see things the way you see things. I've chose my own life path and I'm very set on making sure I have the exact future I want. We want different things now and not to say that that means we can't be friends anymore, it just means we won't be as close anymore. Simply for the fact that I don't really know what to talk to you about without making you uncomfortable or sad or disinterested. I'm sorry that we aren't as close anymore and I'm sorry that you are so sad by it. Some days I wish things were different, but most days I'm so glad things ended up exactly as they did. We are grown women now, entering some of the best times in our lives. I don't want to be someone I'm not, and thats not fair to you for me to pretend. It is what it is. 

I truly hope you read this and understand everything I'm saying. For everyone else who reads this, if you are going through a similar situation with your best friend, just know that IT IS OKAY that you two are drifting apart or that you just aren't friends anymore. We're growing up and maturing and becoming different people. 

I will always cherish and appreciate every minute I spent loving and hanging with my best friend. You truly made an impact in my life and I will forever be grateful for it. I wish you only the best in life and if I'm lucky maybe I'll be there to watch you grow! It's time you go on without me. I will never stop loving you, I'll just be loving you from afar. Thank you for the last 8 years. They truly have been amazing!

Love,

Your Former Best Friend

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