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Learning, Who You’re Dealing with

1st letter to him; After being exposed

By Audra Benee'Published 5 years ago 3 min read
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Where the saga begins

In all honesty, I am deeply wounded by the videos that I saw in your phone. In addition, the text messages from you; pursuing other women. I died a thousand deaths.

In our past, I had never been faced with any other women with you. But as it turns out... you do not value me, certainly not my body, our friendship nor my truth.

Not one time have you considered me while you continued to engage these women in sex during my relationship with you.

You refuse to accept accountability, answerability, or liability, for your part in all your selfishness. Here’s the kicker though...

You judged me for how I responded to what, had a pit in MY stomach; My pain...

But whose standards are you judging me against; yours? Because you are deceitful!

Then you have convinced yourself, that you need to damage me... just so, you can continue to deceive me and bluff everyone else involved. That’s why you asked me... "If I think that I’m the finisher.”

Then you followed up, with; “Do you love me?"

And as far as me loving you... I didn’t answer you, when you told me to tell you that I love you, because I felt like you were being manipulative in your communication and I do not feel emotionally safe with you.

I never, ever, would’ve have pegged you as a predator! I love you, no matter, but I’m confused because I don’t know what’s real with you. I only want One thing, out of all this...

I need Your help with Forgiving You.

Backstory... My man went to court today for what we thought would be a minor sentencing for a traffic stop, in which he ended up being detained. He unlocks his cell phone and hands it off to me with a set of instructions and says, “Call my brother, kids, my mother and answer the phone.”

The first phone call I received is from a woman asking me, is he OK and am I with him. I replied yes to both. She then proceeded to ask me, “And why are you with him?” Now, I’m stunned! Saying, “Because I’m supposed to be with him, who am I speaking to?” Call ended.

That was the introduction to a man that I was currently dating, whom I’ve dated in the past and have known for over 20 years. But never had I met this person who he has become. This man was one of the best relationships that I’ve experienced. Dependable, reliable, honest, respectful, affectionate, attentive, fun, loves and provides for his kids and yours too! Not one time had I ever encountered another woman while being in a relationship with him.

We separated because I wasn’t ready to move in with him at the time. He took that as rejection and started dating someone else. Not realizing that the relationship didn’t have to be over, but during that time in my life, I wasn’t very expressive to communicate those feelings to him. So we parted ways, yet he remained available to me for any need of moral or financial support throughout the years.

Back to the phone...

After that phone call, I went to the girl’s name in the text messages, and found lengthy exchanges between those two, which some messages dated back before he and I started dating again. But the VIDEO of those two was current! That video that video that video!

That prompted me to read all the text messages in his phone. Boy! Was I thrown for a curve! Not only, was it that woman... but at least 6 more that he evidently was having sexual relations with! But how do I address this while he’s dealing with an unexpected incarceration? So, the first time he called me, I said nothing! He called a second time that day; still quiet. But, I was screaming on the inside!

By that evening, I couldn’t contain myself. So I started texting all the women, numbering each one of them, telling them that they were side chick number 1 through 9! (Figuratively speaking!)

By the third time he called me, I could tell his energy was a bit different, which lead me to believe that someone was aware that I sent out texts. And still, he did not mention a thing. So I had to suffer another day of not being able to address this. Now I’m perplexed and a bit annoyed. I’m feeling like now he’s playing games with me! I don’t know how to bottle up all this anxiety that I’m having, so I decided to forward the video to all the women, in his phone. Now that should get him talking!

To be continued...

dating
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About the Creator

Audra Benee'

I am a communicator, who’s love, expression, relationship & sexuality is a part of my spiritually. Following me on my path to mastering love relationships, through my letters; I would like to share some intense moments with the world.

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