Let Go.

The day I met you, I knew I would need you in my life. But I also knew I wasn't ready to let go of my previous scar, the wound was still healing and I knew I had to mend it myself, without any help, especially not your help. So I waited. And I waited in vain. It's been a while and in that while, I learned to heal and I learned to leave you behind. But I have to admit that I was scared of seeing you again because I knew my scar would glow again once my eyes would lay on you. So I tried to be distant, but it was inevitable: I saw you again and you smiled. And that's when I decided that I want to see that smile for the rest of my life. Your smile slowly became the reason of mine; and that's where I went wrong. For the first time, I admit I was wrong. I wanted you to hold my hand but we both weren't ready. So I chose to take it slowly and slow down my pace, I took smaller steps. But I lost. Now, once again, my fear came to life. I don't want to let go, even though I know I have to. I've never praised the Lord, but I swear that every night I look at the Moon and think of you; I look at the Moon and ask to protect me from what I want, what I need. I ask the Moon to protect me from my heart and the love it feels towards you. But I need to be protected from myself first, because I am the one who decided to look your way. I am the one who decided your smile will be my happiness. I am the one who went wrong and I am the one who needs to let go, even if I feel like I can't. And I don't think I will ever be able to. I look at you and all I can think about is how much I want to be next to you, how much I want to kiss you lips. But I never think of letting go. It's because I don't want to.

Letting go is not what I want to do; it is not on the list.

Please don't let go of me either.

I want to hold your hand and forget about the rest of the world;

I want to look into your eyes and forget about how many tears mine had shed;

I want to kiss your lips and forget about all the others.

I want you and nothing else.

Too bad you don't seem to want this.

And I can't understand why.

I cannot understand why I feel like I need you so much.

Or maybe I do? Maybe one day I will be able to make it better. Maybe one day you'll feel the same way.

Maybe it's too early.

Or perhaps it's just not meant to be you and me in the end.

I don't know and I honestly don't want to know.

I only know that I want you and I need to find a way out.

I either let go of you, or risk getting a new scar.

Perhaps I know the reason why the first option doesn't even seem like one, perhaps I know the reason why I need to find a way of working this out, sorting myself out.

Perhaps... I know what's wrong:

I fell in love with you. And I couldn't have made a bigger mistake.