Love in the Digital Age

This is a subject that has interested me quite a lot for some time now, and I have even written about it before on an old blog of mine.

Looking at how finding a romantic partner happened before the digital age, and after digital age could potentially show how, thanks to the internet, finding longer lasting romantic partners has actually become harder.

Before the internet, our grandparents and our parents didn't have the option to go on Tinder and swipe right on the people they found attractive and interesting. They would have to meet someone out in the public. Most of the time, they would find their romantic partners at work, in school, through friends, or even at the grocery store. But today, that doesn't really happen as much anymore. Especially not if you're an introvert like me.

The biggest problem, however, is that online dating, especially Tinder, is now mostly used for quick hookups. The dating scene is pretty much dying, in my opinion.

Try and ask yourself, how many of your Tinder dates have actually been successful and led to a long lasting relationship? And how many of them ended in a one night stand?

However, compared to back in our grandparents' time, we now actually find it intimidating if someone approaches us with romantic interest out on the street. Back then it was more a part of the norm, while today, if someone you don't know would suddenly come up and ask you out on a date, chances are, you would consider that person a bit creepy and too straightforward.

My grandparents on my mother's side actually met at a hospital. She was a nurse, and he came in to visit one of his friends. They fell in love quite quickly, even though there were over 10 years between them, and three months after they met, they got married.

If that was to happen today, people would think you might have rushed into things a bit too quick. But let me tell you this, my grandparents were happily married until my granddad passed away.

I have always found their story quite romantic and inspiring. But I can just not see that kind of thing happening as often in this day and age. It's as if we've become intimidated by talking to strangers because it's a lot easier to just chat to someone online, hiding behind the screen, never actually having to show someone your face if you don't want to. We hide behind a persona, we hide certain parts of our personal life from people online and we feel safer talking to someone online than in real life.

So what can we do to change this?

The answer is actually quite simple, it's only about putting your computer and your phone away and gather the courage to speak to that Starbucks worker you have been eyeing up all week. Slip them a note with your phone number before you leave. The worst thing that could happen is that they won't contact you. But who knows, maybe they'll actually find it charming that you would go out of your way to give him your number. Delete your Tinder, get out there in the real world, and find something more meaningful.