Love of My Dreams

It all started back in high school. I've always been a straight A's honor student, with no friends, no socializing, or anything of that sort. I kept to myself and spoke only when spoken to, or necessary. It was senior year, my final year of high school. Finally, I can get away from all of those annoying people at school. No more loud boys roughhousing and knocking your books down. No more lovey-dovey couples taking up space in the halls. I mean come on, we are supposed to be here to study and learn for the future—not holding hands, sneaking into dark corners, and making babies. I mean no offense to anyone, my own parents were also teen parents. They had me when they were very young (15 to be exact). It was hard on them for many years, until mom got a job at a factory three towns over. This is the main reason why they were always very strict on my siblings and I. We weren't allowed to go out, call friends, or even join clubs. My parents believed it would give us an excuse to sneak around like they once did. I didn't mind, nor did I think much about it, because I understood that they only wanted the best for us. Anyways, I'm getting off track here... where was I? Oh yes!

Most especially NO MORE groups of giggling girls blocking the hallway with their slow pace, continuously stopping to gossip. I mean seriously, "do you not know how to walk and talk at the same time?!" Taking up so much space and walking slow, making everyone else late for class. Ever since we were young, parents, teacher, and school bells have told us repeatedly to be on time, that punctuality is an important thing. My elementary school went so far as to play a two minute jingle to let the little kids know that if they didn't get to class by the time the song ended, you would be in trouble. You can tell that these girls are all longtime friends. I'm pretty sure they see each other all the time, after school, weekends, on social media. So, why block the hallway? As someone who didn't have any friends, I guess I wouldn't understand.

The first half of my school year wasn't very interesting—nothing happened. It was just the same daily routine: first two class, lunch (study in the library), last two class, go home. Before I knew it, Christmas break had rolled around. My family never did anything for Christmas. We stayed home doing our own things, ate dinner together, and went to sleep. This year I started thinking about what I wanted to do about college. I wasn't sure about where I wanted to apply or what I wanted to do, if I should do something I loved or if I should aim for something more financially stable. My parents wanted me to become something great like a lawyer or a doctor. They never really understood what I wanted to do, but all I wanted to do was be an architect. Arts was always my passion, but it's a field with no guarantees of employment. My parents wanted me to do something great but refused to allow me to go to any big universities because it would be too expensive. I didn't know what to do and eventually, I ended up just staying in town and going to the community college.

The Dreams

January passed like a blur, and before I knew it the end of February rolled around. This was when the dreams started. I had a series of dreams that would continuously repeat and pick up where it left off the previous night before.

The first of them started with me going to the library during lunchtime at school, like always. I see myself sitting in the middle of the room, flipping through my assignments. Out of nowhere, I hear a female voice say, "I think they're looking for you." I instinctively look up and turn towards the doors. At the door, three guys poke their heads in, screen the room, and walk in once they have spotted me. As they begin walking in I adjust myself to try and get a look to see who they were, but of course, I couldn't see anything. It was like when you throw a ball high into the air and it gets blocked out by the sun. The light coming from behind them was so bright that I woke up, sweating and in my bed. I tried to catch my breath as I got ready for school. This dream repeats itself for the next couple of nights.

A couple of nights later the second part of the dream picks up where it left off. After hearing the girl's voice and looking up, I still wasn't able to see their faces. As they entered the library, two of them come to sit by me on my left, while one walks around the room. Rather than pay attention to the ones sitting beside me, my eyes follow the one walking around the room as he picked up things, tapped at the computer keyboards, and looked around. Then I notice the nervous, timid voice beside me say, "I was wondering if you planned on attending prom? If so, would you like to go with me?" Giving him an answer that I felt was reasonable, I said "I'm not sure if I could go. I would have to ask my parents first." He made a face as if to say he didn't like my response, but wouldn't outright question it either. Then I heard the cheesiest joke ever—you know the one where they say; "Are you from Tennessee? Because you're the only Ten-I-See." Did that make you laugh? (Yes, I meant you the reader.) I sure hope it did, because it was so silly that in my sleep I felt my lips move up into a smile. As it made me become aware of my dream state. This movement woke me up. This dream repeats itself once more but after the joke, suddenly a husky male voice comes from my right side: "Don't mind him, he's just a dork." In that instant, I felt the warmth of a body by my side. It was the friend who had been wandering around the room. He was leaning in so close that if I had turned my head, my face would've been in his. Just when I begin to blush, I felt myself jerk awake from the dream.

The third dream I found myself in a strange place that I had never been to before. In the distance, I could hear the sound of laughter and good cheer, the titter-tatter of glass cups and silverware in the background. The soft calm breeze of early autumn blows through my hair. I make my way up a fenced path. It seemed to be going towards a countryside vineyard. Even though all around me seemed so peaceful and happy, I just couldn't get over this strange feeling within myself. It felt as though I should be careful and watch out for something. Before I knew it, I was busy picking grapes into a wicker basket. And the people around me also picking away appear to be my classmates, but in reality, I have no idea who they are. As I go to reach for more grapes a hand reaches out to mine and starts to pull me away from the group of people picking grapes. He walks me up a hill a little ways from everyone and turns me to face him. Try as I might, I was unable to see his face and saw only his body: strong, muscular, with a firm grip that made me feel as though he would never let me go. He lifts my chin up and softly places a kiss on my lips. I remember feeling that for a first kiss it was really quite bad. His lips were thin, almost as if he tightened his lips together and just pressed it on mine. Though it was a bad kiss, it felt so real, like he was really touching me. I slowly begin to wake and ended up not being able to go to sleep after waking. I spent that whole weekend just thinking about the kiss.

Time passed with not thinking much about all this, and a week went by with no more dreams about him. As the end of March was about to roll by, I found myself sitting in the library during my lunch hour as I did every day. Looking over my assignments, I suddenly hear the voice of a female say "I think they're looking for you?" Surprised to hear these words I whirl around to see who spoke these familiar words to me. It was the assistant librarian who would often ask me if I needed any help. Instinctively I turned to the door and saw the three guys walking into the library, just as before in my dreams. The strongest scent of deja vu and shock hit me. Not even bothering to pay attention to the guys I knew would be coming to sit next to me, I searched for the one guy who I had been waiting all this time to see. He wasn't anyone who I knew at all, but everything that I had come to know through my dreams told me so much more was to come. In this way was how I met my husband, fell in love with him, and later married him.