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Hey, everyone, I hope you're all having a lovely day. I have been thinking for a while about what my next blog post should be, whilst my hair is tied in a messy bun—with a cuppa and multiple blankets hugging me due to the cold lately. (I look like a human burrito, an adorable one.) And then it struck me, after facing a short-lived relationship breakup, I have been thinking a lot about self-love and what makes us special.
So what makes us special? What makes us unique? What makes us "better" than the next person. The thing is, we are all special in our own way. No one is you, and always remind yourself of that. Even if you're the quiet, anxious girl who believes they have nothing going for them. A big shout out to you (you know who you are). Your caring heart and alternative fashion sense makes you different and makes you who you are, even if your family doesn't agree.
Carry on being you. I can already see a change in your attitude, you seem happier, you're hilarious, and your dark humour makes me laugh so so much. I believe in life we all try and find our place in this world; however, most of us forget to sit down and ask the question "what makes me special?" Lately, I faced a breakup, which wasn't long anyway so I'm over it, but how it happened made me think I wasn't good enough. I was wrong. As humans, we are constantly finding ourselves, finding out new things about ourselves; we're on different paths. However, my breakup involved the other party "not ready," which I completely understood. However, how he went about it, kissing another girl in front of me, made me feel like I wasn't good enough. And that needs to stop, I was good enough, he just wasn't that into me. Which hurts also, but we aren't going to be perfect for everybody.
I wish him the best. I really do. So on my discovery, I found what makes me special is that I have time for people; I will hold my arms open and listen to others' problems and try to boost their self-confidence. I hold hope in my heart that there is good in everybody, which explains why I get hurt; not everyone deserves the good in me. To add onto that, I was having a conversation with my housemate the other day; I said to her, I always get complimented about my appearance but never get complimented on the type of person I am.
I sat and thought to myself what was good about me, and nothing came to mind. She then replied, "You are fiercely loyal, to the point you would do anything for your friends. Your energy and excitement for people when they accomplish something is rare to find. You make them feel proud of themselves. You lift up people's spirits and you're incredibly funny—you know you are." And that meant a lot; that reminded me of the person I am. and that reminded me WHY I am special.
Compliments about our outfit, our makeup, our shoes are a confidence boost, but compliments that involve the type of person you are, the values you hold close to your heart, are the ones that mean the most. So my advice for you: if you want to know why you are special, ask a close friend or a family member, because as people, when a value is in our nature, we believe it's normal for us to do such a thing. WRONG!! Not everyone has the same vibe as you, not everyone is caring, not everyone will stop and give a homeless person food.
So whenever you feel down, simply ask someone you trust, "What do you think is good about me as a person?" and the outcome will make you feel warm inside. (Unless you're a shit person, you may need to reevaluate yourself.) I honestly believe we are all special in our own way, whether we believe so or not. I've had so much pressure around me lately because everyone's getting into relationships; it makes you feel unwanted, "not special." However, I don't need a boy to complete me (I'm not saying you girls do), but personally I feel like I don't need a boy right now.
Self-love is the only important thing to me in this moment of time. I had my fun in my first two years of university; now I feel ready to conquer the world as the woman I have become. I am so proud of myself, and I don't need to kiss a cute guy in the night club to feel complete. My mum is a huge influence when it comes to my outlook on relationships. I have the tendency to run away with the fairies and believe I will live happily ever after. It's my mum who drags me back to reality. She reassures me of my worth and how I really don't need a man right now.
Her support, love, and honesty mean everything to me. She is partly the reason I am good with advice. She's been my best friend for as long as I can remember. I love you, Mum! The truth is, not every person is going to feel the same way about you, but that isn't a bad thing. That love you hold for that person, even if it's not returned, shows you how much of a heart you have and the love you are willing to give. That sneak-peek of your feelings should reassure you that you are capable of love; they just don't deserve that love from you. So don't go "suppressing" it, because what you're really doing is hurting yourself. Take that love and put it towards your dreams and yourself. To conclude this cringe-worthy, soppy post, know your worth; before even jumping into a relationship, love yourself first. You need to be sure of yourself. Your confidence should shine through. Be confident in your skin. No one else is you! Rich coming from me, because I was bitter at first when I saw him with another girl. However, I should really thank him, because from him doing that shows I am worth more. I am most certainly capable of moving on without moving onto another body. (Throws shade.)
However, everyone gets over things in different ways. I had my friends tell me to go kiss another guy, date another guy, but I'm afraid that's not me. I am strong enough to move on with the optimistic mentality I have, as well as my family and friends' support. I will work on my personal development in life, work hard, because it's my last year at university—focus on my blog, my health. I really don't need attention to achieve happiness.
Have an amazing evening. I hope this has inspired you to dig deeper into yourself.