New Life

My story is about starting a new life after 16 years, in another country.

It is still hard for me to believe how my life has turned 180 degrees in three hours; as I have moved to Scotland from Hungary, which takes three hours journey on a plane. I hated, but also loved that day because it was so hard for me to leave everything behind...my family, my friends, my old high school, and my home. But I was excited at the same time for my future, which I believed would turn out pretty good.

When I got to the house, that my mum rented out for us, I felt like I have never felt before: terrified. Only bad thoughts came to my mind, such as: “What am I going to do now without speaking any English?” or “How am I going to succeed in high school?” or “How/When will I get new friends? Will I ever feel safe again?” It was horrible for a long time, and it still is sometimes.

After a month of summer holiday I spent at home, learning some English language, my little sister and I went to our first day at school. Never been so nervous in my entire life, but they were so nice to us and we got a private English teacher which was a big relief. I still somehow felt lost and confused inside. I thought that I had to do something fast, to turn myself into a positive person once again. My mum gave me a book called The Secret which I, by the way, read in two days. So it helped me to think better and do things right. I already started to plan my new life and after a month, I found my first friend, who I already felt like I knew from before or from another life. It sounded crazy but everyone gets this feeling—I thought!

He was handsome and really nice and we both fell in love with each other the first time we met. It was hard for us to communicate for months. I used my smartphone and he was always patient with me. We met every single day, talked every single hour of the day, and we were also in the same class at school, so it was perfect—I can tell! I felt safe and happy again. I felt like I could start a new life with him. Everything became easy. This was almost three years ago, now we’re officially a couple and I am still so grateful for everything he has done for me. He taught me how to talk fluent English with a Scottish accent and I am so proud at how fast I’ve learned. I found myself again with him and I am happier than I have ever been.

However, I still had very hard times to accept that my friends whom I thought were true/real friends, stopped talking to me after a couple of months or a year. They stopped caring. I was devastated. I found really hard to get friends—I still do!

I am also thankful for the school’s support and help, which has lasted for a year by the way. And then they thought that I could learn so much English in a year, so they stopped helping me and put me to National 5 classes. I found it really hard and I was always so stressed out so I had to leave school. It was heartbreaking that I couldn’t go to prom with my classmates and couldn’t finish high school.

However, I never gave up! I applied for college right after I left school. I have waited for almost a year to start my National 5 ESOL course. But it was worth it because now I have finished the course, I'm done with my exams, and I'm ready to start something else to get the life I have always dreamed of. I am so excited to continue my new life. I started three years ago with a boyfriend who’s the best anyone could ever ask for. We are stronger together and always have each other’s back. A loving, supporting family is also needed to always feel safe and happy, so I can’t put it into words, how grateful I am to have them. Although, I’m still hoping that one day, I will find true friends who will never leave or hurt me.