One Year After I Started Dating My Boyfriend, Who Was My Friend, I Truly Found Myself

We all have bad relationships, and I was not in the best place before I started dating my current boyfriend, Freddy. I was dating a guy I'll call Stefan. It was a regrettable experience for a first relationship, for a lack of a better description. I was ashamed to be seen in public with him because of his inappropriate behavior; when he'd act out, nothing was off-limits. On top of that, NONE of my friends liked Stefan because "he acts like a clown." Also, I was surrounded by crazy people who loved to make others miserable nonstop; what was once a relationship I was apart of had become equivalent to a nuclear war zone, and it was sad. Long story short, I put up with too much from people who were far from normal, and it just felt like I was involved in a war that wasn't worth fighting. (98.7, thank you for constantly playing "Dreams" by Fleetwood Mac constantly. Dy the way, "Dreams" (1977) is the ORIGINAL breakup diss track.) It drove me insane and I just straight-up shattered one day. Yeah, Stefan stopped talking to me at the request of someone who makes Cersei Lannister look as innocent as Alice in Wonderland, but I was in for the best part of the biggest slap in the face three months later.

My friend, Freddy, went to a cosplay party with me and a friend before he went to Canada and we just hit it off while "She Bangs" by Ricky Martin played in the background. We were giggling as the one song we've known by heart since we were five and six played in the background, but we ended up jamming out with no purpose. We had SOOO much fun. Our friend, Wendy, said we'd make a cute couple; at first, I thought she was joking around, but she clearly wasn't. That party, before he left for Toronto, ended up working to our advantages, because we started dating. He's originally from Canada, so he goes quite often. And we have a lot in common! We both have hilariously savage parents, Signed and Sealed in Blood is one of our favorite albums, we can't watch telenovelas without keeping a straight face, the list goes on. ("Rose Tattoo" is our jam, don't judge. Telenovelas are so overacted, they're hilarious, don't judge.) In all honesty, we go WAAAAAY back. Freddy was one of my first friends when I moved from California to Florida six years ago, so it all worked. He and I were friends for five years before we started dating.

Flash forward a couple weeks after he gets back from Canada and asks me out. When my mom and my stepdad found out, they were excited. Saying "Yes" worked out in the long run, and now I'm in a much better place. Here's how I'm in a way better place. I don't have to be who Stefan and his fake compadres would want me to be. I don't have to make an effort to obtain the approval of people I'll never be good enough for. I was able to find myself. In the process of it all, I found out that I'm my own entity. I'm very creative, which I wouldn't have known a couple years ago. I'm a straight-up psychology nerd. I'll most likely be a career woman when I grow up. I have a strong desire for success, and there's nothing holding me back. With Freddy, I can be a girl and like Snoop Dogg; hell, I can be my short, loud, filterless, Rancid-loving, punk head self that doesn't need Stefan's approval. Freddy put me in a more positive place, and he wants me to do what I want. We can have a great time when we go out, and there's no drama. I don't know want would've happened if I hadn't given Freddy a chance. I wouldn't have truly found myself, that's for sure. With Freddy, I'm in a way better place than I was a year ago, that's for sure.