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They say the third time is a charm... dear editors, let's see if you will approve this version now. Warmest regards to you all, xoxo.
Celine Dion... her songs are being listened to as I write this. So let's take it back to the beginning.
Actually, scratch that, I am currently listening to "You" by Elijah Woods x Jamie Fine. I absolutely love that song.
TINDER! I swiped right on you and you swiped right too. You messaged me and I was definitely intrigued by you. Turns out we were both from the same Country; that really caught my interest and made my night. I just had to meet you somehow.
We made plans for the next day. On my way to meet you, I tried not to be too anxious. It had been a while since I was meeting someone just in the heat of the moment.
I got to the inn where you were staying for the duration of your trip, sat down, and waited for you. I even positioned myself in a way that would make me look unbothered while I was a nerve-wreck internally.
You came down the stairs and walked towards me. I could see you from my peripheral vision. I didn't dare look up until you were a couple of steps away from me. I finally looked up and there you were with a big smile on your face. I instantly flushed and you gave me a big hug. It felt nice and I wasn't expecting it to be honest. If I hadn't be attracted already from Tinder, I was bloody attracted to you the instant you hugged me.
Nandos... when you kept touching my legs, I wasn't sure if that you showing your interest in me, or you just being you, but it did warm me. I just wanted your hands there.
We ate and you liked the food. I was really happy with that. The evening was young and we weren't ready to depart from each other. We walked and talked and decided to settle at Nathan Phillips Square to relax and enjoy the view.
We were there for hours talking non-stop. I felt like I found the one but at the back of my mind, you lived in the United States. Would it have worked? I wanted it to, despite all the difficulties we would face. For you, you weren't ready.
Eventually, I had to leave, it was 11 PM and I didn't like getting home late.
Promises were made to meet up the next day.
Before I knew it, the next day arrived. The plan was to become tourists and explore the WaterFront with a good friend of mine. You were a good sport and my friend did enjoy your company. When we came across another friend of mine, a male this time, I didn't realize you were giving death glares to him until he told me. All I could do was laugh because I didn't think you liked me like that to even get territorial.
Two weeks left to the end of your trip, and we tried to spend as much time together as we could.
For six months, I was celibate and was planning to go another six months but with you, all was damned.
On the day of your departure, I was with you at the Airport. A very sad day... I almost missed your flight due to a delay at work. As soon as I was done work, I took an uber straight to the airport where you were waiting for me.
We were both sad; we both didn't want you to leave. Once you left it was never going to be the same. You'd go back to your life and I'd be back to mine.
I made a last attempt. I gave you an option... I told you I could wait for you and all I needed from you was a YES. You shook your head, telling me no. I was stubborn, I wanted you to be selfish, but you weren't. You knew it wasn't going to be ideal. You dragged me to an empty washroom where you kissed me like your life depended on it or maybe that was how it felt. That was our last kiss and a goodbye kiss. You left but not without saying if you found out that if a guy hurts me, you'd beat them up and steal me from them. That was quite hilarious.
We kept in touch when you got back; still video-chatted. Then you crushed my hope of a you and me.
You got back with your ex.
I accepted the fact that you were never to be mine, as I was never to be yours. We were just going to stay friends.
We happened to collide with each other and our lives changed. I introduced you to something new you never wanted to really explore. I was your first. I was honoured when you blushed and told me.
Thank you for that honour. If you ever read this, I loved my time with you and I don't regret anything.
We had our time together and it was wonderful. Though we hardly talk now. I know if I ever message, you'd respond. You have always responded. I am glad to say we are still friends and things didn't end on a bad term. Thank you for always making me laugh when I was sad.
Now, I am in a happy relationship with the first person I ever dated and I hope to one day be his husband. You have nothing to fear, I know he will be good to me, be committed and loyal to me. You won't have to beat him up to protect me.
I told myself I was going to send you this after I finished this. I started this a couple of months ago and I couldn't bring myself to finish this until now. However, now that it is completed, I am not going to still send this to you. Maybe you might come across and you will know it was me.
Thank you, F.