Please Forgive Me

My friends, please do forgive me. I have not been so grateful for I feel as though I am not like you. I mean, it is hard to even spend time with you all. You are busy or you just cannot come out. It is sad, and I feel even more sad. During school, I cried. For so many nights, tears just dripped down my cheeks just to forget you all. It is difficult. Very difficult. I was in yearbook. I chose yearbook because I thought it would be fun. It was fun, but it was also very stressful. I took pictures, and I have to upload them. Then I have to write about it in present tense, past tense, and then a quote. It was not easy because my partner did almost nothing. All the burden was on me, and you all did not even looked a single bit concerned. It hurt my feelings and my heart very much. That's why, it was decided: I would leave you all. Peacefully and happy. I do love you, my friends, but my heart breaking matters the most. My friends, please forgive me. When I said yearbook needed help and that I had to stay there, it was a lie. All I did was watch my dramas and sleep. It was so that I could detach myself from you all. I knew it would be hard because I love you all too much. And I met someone new. But that was just another mistake. When I said I could not see you because of yearbook distribution, that was true. I asked you to visit me, which only a few of you did. It made me happy. Although I did not attend to you all, it made me happy with just a smile, wave, and a hi. My friends, please forgive me. At one point, I had muted you all. I just did not want to talk. The most disappointing thing was that even though I did mute you all, it was not like there would be a single message. It disappointed me so much that I cried. I never said it though. When there was a single message, it made me happy, and I thought, "this is really, truly sad." When I message you something, I don't think you will reply, so I just exit, thinking the conversation ended. And it was then, it was then when I thought that this was truly pathetic. When I messaged the group chat, there was no message. No response. Even when it was a question, still no response from you all. My friends, I'm sorry. Please do forgive me. When graduation was approaching, I was thinking of leaving. Not leaving as in suicide, but leaving as in moving. It did not happen. But I wrote you all letters. Letters that I put my heart into, but then retracted it. It would have gone too far. I did not want that to happen. So I only put in ten percent. My feelings were true. I expected letters from you all also, but it seems that did not happen. I was truly disappointed. It made me feel like I was just a classmate instead of a friend. Although I never wrote them, I still gave you them. When the time comes, which I have set to two years, I will take my leave. Letters will be sent out. And I will never appear in front of you all again. I do not want this to happen, but I will do this for my heart. It just hurts to much to continue. So my friends, my message to you: I love you, I am sorry, please forgive me.