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Project Soulmate...NOT

Is it wrong or right for people to put a price on love?

By Dasha IlazarovaPublished 6 years ago 3 min read
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In a world of dating apps and cat fishing, I have grown to understand that dating and finding that “perfect match” is now just a click away—NOT. It’s a complete SH*T SHOW. I am sure I will tell you those dating stories later, but until then, I found myself trying to go along with the conformity of looking for the perfect “man” while swiping through endless pictures of “human looking thingies” that supposedly had great jobs and educational backgrounds (kidding again). Half of them had missing teeth, mommy issues, or weird fetishes (NO! You cannot lick my nostrils!!). Anyway, I was getting nowhere. It was difficult to find someone who can string along three sentences without using an immense amount of “LOL” after every other word (GREAT CONVO).

After about ten horrible dates, a partial one-week “relationship” and a few frustrating screams into my pillow, my best friend suggested I seek a professional. No, not a therapist (although I was considering after all the hideous dates). A “dating guru” she explained. Someone who found love for others for a living. Well, that should have tipped me right off because you have to find it yourself.

Anyway, I was excited, scrolling through the “guru” page and reading endless love stories, seeing the “happy couple” photos; I was beginning to think there was room in the love and happy side of life for me. I was given a long questionnaire; of course, filling it out was a nightmare but I was persistent. I typed in every detail I could share about my past, tastes, interests, “ideal husband.” There it was. All filled out and ready to send.

In the midst of all the excitement, I had to bring myself back down from planet “you will soon find a husband and have beautiful babies” and ask the question most New Yorkers ask when trying to save a buck or two, “how much will this cost?

My best friend CeeCee reassured me that it should not be “much.”

Even if it’s a thousand bucks, it is worth it!” she said, sending me hearts through the phone.

Fine,” I thought. I figured if I really wanted something great I should invest! Just like with anything in life.

No one was giving me answers though, and being the creep I am, I decided to find them myself. Scrolling through what seemed to be thousands of articles about this “guru” I finally saw a small tiny liiiitttlllee sentence about the cost of this brilliant matchmaker! Can you guess? No, really?

TWENTY THOUSAND DOLLARS. (I am SURE tax was included, maybe a new life too, I don't know.) My smile sank into a small but persistent little frown as I looked up at CeeCee. She must have found the same thing at the exact time because all she did was stare at me, wondering what I was going to do next.

Well, that won’t ever work,” I said out loud.

All jokes aside, I got to thinking.

Is it wrong or right for people to put a price on love?

I mean, if I paid the 20 thousand dollars, what would I say? “oh hey, honey! Be nice to me, I paid 20 grand for ya!” (hahaha…no). It is incredibly frustrating to know that dating, flowers, loyalty, and effort are now almost replaced with “swipe left if ya like him” and “that’ll be 20k please for his number.”

I was appalled. What’s the chance in actually matching with someone, for free, and really liking them? Slim. Super slim. I just wanted something real. I didn’t need a perfect husband. What I did need, was a man who wasn’t all put together but strives for magic. Someone who included me in his world just like I would include him. Deep down, I knew that 20k wouldn’t get me that. It was something I had to find on my own time and so, it quickly went from “Project Soulmate” to “Project Soul NOT.”

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About the Creator

Dasha Ilazarova

Someone who is on a mission to make everyone feel that they are not alone no matter what they go through. Including crazy dates, heart wrenching relationships, personal life struggles & everything in between!

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