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I was surfing the web recently when I came across an interesting video clip that discussed older adult's sex lives. Maria Shriver was interviewing a group of mature individuals. Everyone in the group was over the age of fifty. The group was composed of single people and married couples. They discussed their love lives in an open and frank way. There were no embarrassed giggles or bashful looks. I found the participants had interesting comments to make about how they defined what sex is to them.
How Much Sex?
It may be hard for the younger generation to imagine themselves still participating in sexual activity when they are in their fifties, sixties or seventies. However, research shows that many baby boomer couples enjoy sex once or twice a week. That could be more times than some younger couples indulge in love making. This may because they are too caught up with work and young children to have the desire to be intimate. In fact, one of the couples in the video said they enjoyed intercourse more times a week because they were now empty nesters. I think this is true for a lot of empty nesters. The reason this could be that not having the constrictions of children living in the home may make them feel more free to indulge in uninhibited sex. It would seem that as we get older sex can get better.
Older Singles and Online Dating
How unattached singles find partners was also discussed in the video. Based on what the singles said, it would appear that joining an online dating site is a way to find a relationship. Online dating used to be considered mainly for the young. This has changed and now many seniors find partners this way. However, one of the single men interviewed indicated there can be a difference of opinion about how to proceed with the relationship. He felt that the women he had met online were more inclined to want sex before he was ready to make that move. I found myself a little surprised at his perspective. However, it was also mentioned that research shows that single boomers would be open to "a friend with benefits relationship." Maybe this explains why some women and men might feel that you don't need to make a commitment before entering into a sexual relationship.
A Different Concept of Sex
One of the most poignant views on what sex came from the oldest couples in the group. They believed that intercourse was not the only way to have a sexual relationship with your partner. Their concept of sex now is that you demonstrate your love of each other in a calmer way such as a kiss or snuggling up to each other in bed at night. I wonder if their definition of sex could be something all couples could indulge in on occasion. Just lying next to your other half and having a good snuggle once in a while could benefit the relationship. It could also take the pressure of feeling the need go all the way. Especially when you are not feeling the urge to use the amount of energy it takes to engage in what is considered the more traditional way to have sex.