Simple Love

So, regardless of the title we all know that love is far from simple.

I'm 20 now and in my first real relationship and I've been with him for over a year and a half so it's still basically new. Our relationship hasn't been easy, there's been arguments, fights, lots of tears but we've had great times as well but doesn't every couple.

So, we both have problems and our baggage but guess what, who doesn't? Our own insecurities have been the main point in our arguments and being as honest possible I can say that I've started about 70% of them.

You see, my mental health isn't great and hasn't been for a number of years and my partner's isn't too good either but we're there for each other when we need to be. There have been times where my depression has gotten the better of me and my boyfriend has taken care of me and supported me and visa versa.

You know, my partner sometimes compares our relationship and our life to other couples we know, some of which are better and some not so much and I don't know if there are any other couples​ who do this eventuality you shouldn't be. What I say and know is that every person, every couple, moves at their own speed, at their progress. You just need patience because for some reason we should have a house and proper jobs and so on but we're still young, I mean, I'm 20 and he's 26 we still have so many more years to get where we want to be in life, nothing happens overnight.

Sometimes we sit inside our own heads to much and let things get the better of us even when we know what we're thinking is stupid or we know it's not true but still after all the time we've been together commutating like that is still hard, for both of us, him slightly more than me.

Sometimes all it takes is a cuddle or a touch to let them know you're there for them and I try to be supportive, because that's what being someone's partner entails. He knows no matter how much of an arsehole he is or how much he may try and push me away I'll always have his back and I've got him, so sometimes just reminding him is enough for us to talk about what's going on in our heads.

We are not as bad as when we first started going out, the arguing happens less although it doesn't lose any intensity, we still have our occasional bad days but we get through them quicker now and I think every problem we've encountered, every bump in the road we've hit we have gotten through and we're still there for each other.

I know sometimes it feels like I could smother him while he sleeps but I'm sure he's felt the same about me sometimes. But even then he still means more to me than anything.

I know we annoy each other and I know that we hurt each other sometimes, even when we don't mean to but at the end of we forgive each other and we remind ourselves why we love our partner and why we want a life together, sometimes I still wake up and think I'm dreaming or that maybe it's all in my head and I have to pinch myself to make sure it's real, that I have actually got his guy who is perfect for me, no matter his problems or mine and no matter what our faults are, he is perfectly screwed up for me and I'm perfectly screwed up for him.