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I don't want to speak for everyone in their early twenties, but trying to figure out if you want to be in a relationship or not is a tough decision. It's a completely different decade than 40 years ago because we're not being pressured or forced to marry someone and buy a house all before the ripe age of 26. Women are independent creatures now too, not to say we don't like having a man to fix the sink or get something from the top shelf for us, but we are making something for ourselves these days. We have the choice to choose a career we are passionate about and are able to make enough money to be financially independent. However, what if there's that little voice in the back of your brain saying "you need a man" or "it would be a lot nicer to come home to someone?"
There's no way you'll meet anyone at work, you've already gone over the options in your head a million times. Dave the IT guy is too quiet, Josh is a bit too short for your liking and Nolan just lacks a certain something. It's okay to be picky, but you know you're probably going to reach for your phone to download Tinder or Bumble, those apps that you deleted in a rage over not finding anyone right for you. So you pull your account up on Tinder going through the matches you made previously, looking through the few guys you actually met up with but never saw again.
Let's face it, this isn't going to work. This weird age of being 21-25 has so many complications with dating it's almost a liability at this point. As individuals, most of us haven't even figured out who we are yet. We don't know what we're looking for in a relationship and damn, what constitutes a relationship these days anyway? Do you see them once a week or four times a week? Who the fuck knows.
All I know is that I'm a full time student still living at home, so the thought of getting into a relationship with the goal of being together forever really blows my mind. It's okay to not know who you are or know what you want. It's also good to experiment with dating because it's a great way to figure out what you really don't like, so you can eventually narrow down what it is you actually want in a partner. Now, I didn't say you were going to find a lifetime romance on Tinder but it is a good way to date a lot without having to go out into the real world and meet people organically (which is so damn time consuming). This is also a great time of the century where it is "acceptable" for women to sleep around like men do. Take this to your advantage! I mean don't feel like you need to sleep with every person you go on a date with, but don't be afraid to experience some new things, if you know what I'm saying. ;)
So, if I've gotten you to read this far you're probably wondering, what is the point of this article?
Well the main point I'm trying to get across is to not rush into a relationship with some guy just because you think you "want a relationship." Be on your own and start dating different types of men (or women). You will eventually find yourself in all of this by seeing how your personality coincides with the many people you will meet. It's okay to be selfish too, you can actually be selfish right now. It's okay to not want to date a guy that wants you. It's okay to do things for yourself without thinking about other people. That's the best part about being single in your early twenties. There's so much time to practice self care, to grow to love yourself and meet other people. You may think you want a relationship but most of the time we just want to get close physically with someone. The stress of a relationship is just not worth it sometimes. Have fun with the single life!!