Humans logo

Telling off False Friends

How to Get Rid of Them

By Iria Vasquez-PaezPublished 6 years ago 3 min read
Like

Telling off a false friend who is clearly not your real friend is quite easy. My real friends respect my boundaries. Some people I’m not going to be friends with ever again since they took up my time, and demanded I go see them rather than them staying longer with me. Just because somebody pretends to reciprocate doesn’t mean that they are a real friend. Frenemies have an agenda and that is to bring you down. They put on a false show of being your real friend. I have had quite enough of false friends who do not claim to like me.

My real friends these days maintain their own lives and we hang out sometimes. A false friend can be easy to cut off contact with as they drag you down, take up your time, and make you cave in to their demands. It is more about them than it is about you and for them, a mutual exchange. Sometimes, casual friends are better than serious friends because serious friends like to invite themselves over for dinner when you are unprepared and needing privacy. Some of the frenemies friends are able to respect your boundaries since they know that sometimes your introversion requires alone time.

Nothing pisses me off more than when people violate my boundaries and then pretend it didn’t happen. I dropped an endocrinologist like this. I dropped a friend like this. I dropped an ex like this. Some people do not walk around their whole lives violating boundaries but people with personality disorders do that. People with personality flaws are very much annoying without realizing they are being annoying. Borderlines are into hating you one minute, seething in silence, and then liking you the next moment, salivating and slobbering all over you in the next breath.

I can’t stand idiots who violate my boundaries. One such boundary is “don’t come over if I’m not feeling well.” Somebody violated that one in 2016 and I was very pissed off but I had to be cordial. I really should have gotten more angry than I did. As in, don’t come over needy person. Don’t you dare. I tried to make this known but boundary violators like putting your boundaries on ignore even if you try to set them. This brand of bully or evil person is chronically unstable. I had to dump this person because she was driving me crazy. The bottom-line is, she messed up. She picked a bad day to invite herself over 50 miles out of her way.

If that is all kinds of messed up, then by all means, feel free to read on. There are days I can’t stand being around anybody. Those are rare and far between since I’m medication consistent, having been stable for a long time. The thing is though, I’m an introvert, and I get overwhelmed easily. I do not want to be in crowds. I don’t like bars. I prefer to stay home to write and read or perhaps study math in more detail so I can eventually try to test out of math classes so I can get into calculus a bit sooner. I also like learning about how computers work, and I want to build my own laptop someday with "made in the USA" parts. My frenemy just didn’t appreciate me after a while and she took me for granted. So I dumped her. I made a clean break. I told her not to call me. I had to block her for a good long while. Then I unblocked her and she commented as to why I wasn’t taking her phone calls. She was needy beyond belief due to various circumstances beyond the scope of this article that have to remain private. I’m fed up with irresponsible people on top of that. I’m totally fed up. I want to avoid irresponsible people in general. I have to screen people for that. Anybody like my mother I just have to dump.

friendship
Like

About the Creator

Iria Vasquez-Paez

I have a B.A. in creative writing from San Francisco State. Can people please donate? I'm very low-income. I need to start an escape the Ferengi plan.

Reader insights

Be the first to share your insights about this piece.

How does it work?

Add your insights

Comments

There are no comments for this story

Be the first to respond and start the conversation.

Sign in to comment

    Find us on social media

    Miscellaneous links

    • Explore
    • Contact
    • Privacy Policy
    • Terms of Use
    • Support

    © 2024 Creatd, Inc. All Rights Reserved.