The Games We Play Aren't Healthy and Here's Why

It seems that everyone is playing games these days. I’m constantly hearing from both men and women that they are tired of playing games. But what if it isn’t really a game for someone in particular—just the way they act? It could be that they're not interested in you or in a relationship. Sometimes people play games to put up walls for fear of being hurt. With this in mind, here are a few strategies for those of us that are truly serious about finding love and being in a mature relationship…

For Women

1. Don’t be shy.

Here’s the blatant truth: Men hate to be teased. You are going to need to tell him up front what your intentions are. I’m not suggesting you mention that you want 2.5 kids and a white picket fence on the first date. What I’m saying is that if you’re inviting him upstairs, you need to lay the ground rules. Try something like, “Would you like to come upstairs and see my living room? The bedroom is off limits for now and I’m kicking you out in an hour, but…” This way he knows what’s going on. Men aren’t mind readers.

2. Make it real.

The women that have the most luck with men really aren’t playing any sort of game. When he calls, they are truly busy doing other things. When they act like they don't care, they really don’t. Why? Because their life and what they are doing is much more important than any guy. Make yourself your number one priority.

3. Bail out.

If you feel like a guy is playing with your head, jump ship. If you want a mature relationship, this is not the guy for you.

For Men

1. Don’t lie.

Geez, I certainly have a way to work this into every article. If you just want some fun, tell her. If you are done with games and want something more real, convey that to her. No woman can be upset with a guy if he is upfront about everything from day one.

2. Be eager.

If you’ve found a great girl (assuming you are ready for a committed relationship), don’t listen to your bros and wait three days after the first date to text her! If she's a great catch, you can bet there are plenty of other dudes too shameless to play stupid games that are texting her. Don’t let her be the one that got away…

3. Don’t be a stalker.

So, yes, I’m advising a man to go after what he wants. Wine her, dine her, buy her gifts...whatever you think will work to get this girl. But if she’s not showing much interest, proceed with caution. This would include her telling you she “likes you as a friend” or “she’s not ready for something serious.” When she altogether stops answering your texts...take the hint! There are plenty of fish in the sea.

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