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The Healer and The Vampire

Empaths and narcissists, what are the red flags?

Without making them a life partner. 

At first I thought it was really cute how cocky she seemed to be for a girl. I thought that the little grumpy moods were easy to overcome, and that through love those would soften. But the truth is, there were plenty of red flags, even previous to those thoughts, after moving in together. When we decided to move in together she went back and forth at the last minute. To the point that I finally said, no I don’t think this is right. Eventually she convinced me she just had cold feet. I was going to be moving to a completely new place four hours from where I was. It was the first one of many red flags.

Empaths crave in their being to help others, as well as to be accepted for who they are. We feel things on higher vibrational frequencies than most. We are caretakers and healers. The problem comes when when we get involved with someone who we feel needs help. As a Medium and Spiritual Life Path Coach, it is very embarrassing to say I have done this more than once. But we all know the truth will set us free! That is why I decided to write about this. To truly let go of something that is harming one's vibration, we must see the whole picture, and what lessons there are for us.

A narcissist is skilled at being a victim, and then turning well meaning empath partners into one. They do this through extreme manipulation, control, and by stripping you of your identity. They break you with the most treacherous vile insults and lies. Then when they cannot hurt you one on one anymore, they will find another way. Until one day they have you right where they want you; completely broken, submissive, and completely disillusioned to the truth. You begin to question who you are and your own sanity. When they cannot do this to you quietly anymore, they will move on to the people around you. Everything that they say about you is switched, they make you out to be the monster. This is very difficult for empaths, we mirror people back to themselves on a higher level, exposing truths narcissists may not be ready to accept.

They make you lose jobs, friends, and isolate you from everyone including themselves. You become reliant on them for everything, and they end up with all of your power. The great question is how to avoid this. Looking back it was little things like trying to pacify moods, be the bigger person, allowing my boundaries to be crossed, and holding no value for who I am as a spirit and human. The hardest thing to do is to take your power back. This happens two ways... little by little, or all at once, because you choose you and you walk away for your highest good.

The important thing to remember in this is that we cannot help everyone, and we cannot help everyone because not everyone is ready to see that they need help. The difference between the narcissist and the empath? There are many. The empath is fighting their way out of the darkness. The narcissist is completely satisfied there. The narcissist is stealing energy, and the empath is sharing it freely. Empaths do not absorb! Just observe, and definitely do not look to these types as love interests. They have their own journey. We are each on this journey, but we are all in different places. We are all teachers and students to each other, so be wise in who you choose as a partner. Know who you are before them, and if that starts to grow, as someone becomes a permanent part in your life, then you know you are going the right direction. Anything or anyone who takes you backwards isn’t going to later take you forwards. Blessings and Love!

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The Healer and The Vampire
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