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The Masculinity Prison

Men are trapped by invisible bars that come in the form of social norms and prejudices; it's time to break free.

By Will DennisPublished 7 years ago 3 min read
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Photo by William Ferguson

As a male who has now been on this earth 28 years I can say that I have broken out of the Masculinity Prison. However, I am certainly still on probation with a plethora of re-programming still to do. Sadly, I am one of the lucky ones that even is aware that I was in prison or even willing to acknowledge a prison even exists.

Now when I talk about prison, I don't actually mean being confined in a psychical building or am even trying to begin to insinuate the masculinity prison is anywhere near as severe as an actual criminal prison but it gives a good metaphor.

Now that that is cleared up, what is the Masculinity Prison and is it even actually a thing? Well, I can only answer this from my perspective but YES, this is a thing and something I think more men (and women for that matter) should be aware of. Through my eyes, the masculinity prison is the everyday customs and prejudices that stop men from doing things that they probably actually want to do. It's the social conformity of what a man should be; "A man should be strong", "Real men don't read", "Men go out drinking and Women stay at home." The biggest one of them all is not to be seen as gay, which I personally find mental because one, I know I'm not gay and two, there is absolutely nothing wrong with being gay. Therefore when guys say that "You can't have a chicken korma because it's gay," I don't bow to it and not have a korma, I think, Jesus these guys are missing out on some good korma just because it's not manly. What's worse is they are most likely struggling through a Vindaloo just to be seen as manly amongst their peers.

Now I went with a food example because most people like food, however, it acts as the perfect metaphor for what the Masculinity Prison is. Men don't do things they may want to do and that they will enjoy doing; instead men take the option of doing things that aren't as enjoyable simply to save face. So where does all this pent up frustration go? Probably into excessively drinking, fighting and womanizing. It breeds the mentality that women are just for sex and it's okay to treat them with less respect than you would give to a man. If you do take a different approach then you are gay or feminine.

There are millions of examples that can be given and different nuances that keep men within the Masculinity Prison and the video below will share some more of them but I hope it has given you some understanding of what it is.

Now the most dangerous part of this, I believe, is that men don't talk about emotions or themselves or what they are going through. Men are just meant to drink beer, make jokes and deal with stuff. As a guy who has never been shy about sharing my emotions or showing that I'm scared of some things, I am known as the guy with a feminine side. I embrace it and wear it as a badge of honor but for most guys, that's not in the question and they can't be seen in that light so they hold stuff in. This I believe leads to mental health issues and the scarily high number of suicides amongst young men.

This post was not to divulge into every extremity and explore all the different reasons why the historic view on what masculinity is causing so many young men problems. It was made in the hope that it will at least make men aware of the masculinity prison and open their eyes to it so they can begin to work out of it themselves in their own way. Some men may want to get out and explore a life outside of the invisible social bars but some may have a strong belief that the typical manly man is what they want to be and they are happy with that and that's fucking fantastic. The world needs that but only if it means you being you!

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About the Creator

Will Dennis

Just me being me. I think deep and wide about a lot of things. I believe a man should be free to be his own man, not what society tells him a man should be.

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