The Morning After...

#MyWorstDate

Note: (names left out for author purposes)

Have you ever gotten so drunk you cannot remember how you ended up where you were? I did, and this is how my worst one night stand went.

I was getting dressed up on a Saturday night. I threw on some eyeliner and applied the pitch black mascara to my lashes. The evening air and my girls had me overwhelmed to head out to my favorite bar. We took off down the driveway in my little black four door car until we arrived to where we were dead set on going. Going up the wooden stairs to the bar doors, I would have never imagined the night I was going to have. I got inside and one beer led to another while the whiskey slid down my throat easier than it was getting in. I had met a group of people that seemed pretty nice, but then again I was drunk. I had left with these people with no idea where we was going—that or I forgot and I had passed out in the seat before arriving anywhere.

I woke up. I took a look around with a pounding in my head like drums beating in the back of my brain. I sat up and looked down from what felt like ten feet and there was no one to be seen. I took another look down and there was a dog—no one around but this dog in a super nice house. I wanted down out of this bed and I realized it was a Monster truck bed! I could not find the way out of this bed and I started to freak out a little bit until this man walked in the room and said I had to climb down the tire! I immediately asked to be taken back to the bar. I had lost my phone, my car keys, and my money. I walked outside with this guy to be taken back to town to the bar and when I stepped outside, he was unlocking a big white rusted looking creeper van. My mind went straight from calm to asking myself what the hell I did the night before. I finally got back to the bar, got out, and started to walk in when I noticed my car was nowhere to be found. I had a ten dollar bill in my pocket when I walked up those steps and a beer sounded pretty great. I opened the double doors, walked in and everyone looked at me, thinking and saying, "Look at you, what a mess!" I laughed with the makeup on my face from last night and said,

"Hey, I lost my phone, I lost my $25,000 car, I lost my bank card, and only have ten dollars in my pocket, so who is gonna buy me a beer?"

By the time I got the word beer out I had the entire bar buying me a drink and leaving me five dollars when they left. I sat in the bar for seven hours when my niece showed up!

She yelled across the bar, "I have been looking for you all day!"

I asked if she had my car and she did, but she did not have my bank card. I found my bank card with my friend that was there the night before but I never found my phone.

I couldn't remember everything that went on that night but what I did remember made it the worst one night stand I have ever had.