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It's hard to tell when you've found the one you're going to spend the rest of your life with. We go through our lives with many "the ones" whether that's at age 15 or 30. We are always searching for the person who is "the one."
At young ages, we think we found the person who is our whole world. We think that we'll die without them. But once we lose them, we realize how much better off we are. We step in front of the mirror, wipe away our tears, and smile because we finally have that realization. We are stronger without them than we were with them.
There are some people in this world who go their whole life without finding the one. Some don't ever find them. For many reasons, right place, wrong time. Too much going on, not ready, not prepared, afraid, drained, scared. There are several factors that play into it.
Then there are those who don't believe that there's such thing as "the one." And that is okay. Everyone has their own beliefs. But the rest of us keep searching for them.
Sometimes, the one is right under our noses. We don't realize it because of all the external factors but they are there. What sucks about finding the one is that you don't really notice that that's who they are until they're gone. A break up that has caused you to miss every single thing that you hated about them.
How they snored so loud you thought somehow a bear got into your house and laid down with you. How they knew what to do that made you mad and they only did those things for their enjoyment. Or how they did things that you hated but once you broke up, you realized you loved them.
By that point, it could be too late. But on the other hand, miracles do happen and love always finds a way.
That's my story. Love found a way. Several times actually because it wasn't always hearts and roses. It was guts and blood.
I found the person I am going to spend the rest of my life with. I never thought that the person I would love was actually the person I hated. I know they say that hate is a strong word, but there will never be a word that best describes how I felt about him other than hate.
I dated him for four months during the summer before my sophomore year in high school. I was the happiest I had ever been and my heart was so full of love. Sounds too good to be true, right? Well you are correct because right before school started, we broke up. And it killed me. I didn't realize how much I actually cared for this boy or how much I loved him. My heart shattered into millions of tiny pieces. And those million pieces shattered into millions of pieces.
We used to go for walks around our town and he liked to pick me up and spin me around and then place me on the ground with a small kiss on the nose. I hated it. I hated that he always picked me up. But he always did it and after we broke up, I missed that the most. Or how he would give me a hug from behind, he would wrap me up in his arms put his head on my shoulder and squeeze. Then there was also the way he stared at me. He would look at me with those beautiful blue eyes and when I would ask him why he was looking at me he would say, "Cause I like lookin' at you. You're beautiful." I know it sounds crazy but man oh man, I hated it every time.
But for the four months we were not together, I missed it. I missed every single thing that I used to hate. I spent every day reminiscing about all the fun times we had together. I even tried to date someone else thinking that I could get over this boy who I only dated for four months. But I knew that it was him I was going to spend the rest of my life with.
And here I am four years later, engaged to that boy and planning our wedding for July of 2019. I found the one. I am lucky for that. I know people who have been searching their whole lives for what I have and they still haven't found it.
I guess the message out of this is do not stop searching. Do not give up. There is someone out there waiting for you, too. You just have not crossed paths yet.