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Through the Looking Glass

No Love at All

By Olivia GracePublished 6 years ago 5 min read
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We matched on Tinder today and you messaged me an hour after matching.

We've been speaking for three weeks everyday and you finally asked me to meet you.

I met you for the first time today. You laughed at all my jokes and said all the right things. I thought you were the one.

You asked me to be your girlfriend one month after we met. You took me to dinner and we went back to yours afterwards. Everything felt perfect.

We had been dating for a year and I thought we were still strong. You obviously didn't think so too.

The first night you made me feel guilty was our anniversary. My phone had run out of battery when I was out with my friends and you went mental, claiming I had been cheating on you. That night I slept on the sofa regretting even leaving the house.

The first time you put me down was at your cousin's wedding. You told me I looked fat in that dress and proclaimed that I was dressing "slutty" for male attention. That was the first night you hit me, and the last.

I told my sister that you hit me tonight. She saw the bruises that I had tried to cover with makeup and I think she guessed straight away. To this day you still don't know she knows.

When my sister asked me if I was scared of you the other night I answered with a no. That night I lied.

When someone told me they'd seen you kissing another girl at the back of the club I shook my head and didn't believe it. Turns out it was true.

My mum told me I had changed and asked if I was feeling bad again. I said I was fine and that I was just tired. I lied, again.

When you told me you loved me I said it back. Turns out you didn't mean it, not like I meant it.

When you told me it was my fault and that I wasn't "pretty enough," I believed you. To this day I still do.

A month after you hit me I finally had the courage to leave you. My friends told me I had done the right thing. I thought so to.

I got the text message from you saying how sorry you were and how you wanted me back. I went back.

When we cuddled under the covers and whispered sweet nothings I believed you. I guess you were pretending.

We went on holiday together for the first time. As we sat by the pool, I ignored you staring at the other girls in their bikinis and put my top on. You made me feel insecure that day.

We even had a child together. Our first girl and we named her after your Grandma who had passed earlier that year. She was beautiful, not like me you said.

Our baby girl was 4-months-old when you left. You told me I couldn't please you anymore because I was always breastfeeding or tired. You said you had found someone new. I cried that day, more than I've ever cried before.

You moved in with her two weeks later. I saw you walking hand in hand down the street and you passed the stroller without even so much as a glance. I couldn't stop your baby from crying that night.

It's been three years now and your child is nothing like you. She's intelligent. She's kind. And she tells me she loves me every day. She doesn't even know who you are.

I saw you in town the other week. You looked like you hadn't washed in four days and your beard was scatty. You didn't have her on your arm and you walked alone.

I got married to the man I love today. Three years since I saw you in town and three years since my baby girl has even mentioned your name. No one hears from you anymore; I never hear from you anymore.

I found someone who loves us. Who can take care of us and who doesn't have a wandering eye. We pay the bills on time and we tell each other we love one another every single day.

I don't know where you are, nor do I care. Our child doesn't know who you are and is calling another man daddy.

At the time when you cheated and when you left I thought my world had come to an end. I convinced myself that I was unworthy of love because that's what you taught me. You told me I wasn't good enough and I believed you. Now I've made a life for myself. I watched my baby girl grow and found someone who loves me; really loves me. And you? I don't know about you because you're irrelevant. You're irrelevant to my and my daughter's lives.

So thank you for doing what you did. If it wasn't for you I wouldn't be sitting next to my husband with our daughter, the happiest I've ever been.

Let this be a lesson to anyone who decides to cheat. You will never come out on top. We will always overcome you and we will always achieve more than you. You have not ruined or broken us. You've only ruined any chance of a family with someone who truly loves you. Now you have to live with that.

No love at all.

breakups
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About the Creator

Olivia Grace

Hello there! I am a 17 year old girl from Salisbury who loves to write. I do have a blog which is https://oliviagrace.blog/ so do check that out :)

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