Tips for a Healthy Relationship

Relationships can be a beautiful union if each party applies themselves and wants to make things work. Not every relationship is perfect nor is it always easy. There may come times where compromise is very needed, whether it is deciding on something small like where to eat or a much bigger matter. No one should feel taken advantage of, exhausted, or resentful towards their spouse throughout the relationship. There are many reasons why couples get tired of each other, cut off communication, act spiteful towards one another, and other acts of discontentment. Below are a few tips and advice when it comes to having a healthy relationship.

Work on Yourself

Often people say that they want to find their other half. This implies that they are not whole by themselves. People coming together in a union should first work on themselves so that they can become more independent and absolve any trust issues or detrimental perceptions they may still have. According to work done by Kim Bartholomew, anxiously attached people will have a negative perception of themselves and seek validation from others (Streep, 2014). Unresolved childhood trauma has a major influence on the outlooks and choices we make as adults. This also is why many individuals marry or pursue people that have many similar characteristics to their parents without even being aware of it. There could be a lot of unconscious trauma festering in the mind that one may not be aware of. So, it is important to learn yourself again and practice self-love. Once you master loving the self, you will be more emotionally/mentally available and receptive to loving someone else.

Do Not Compare

Many people who fantasize about their ideal relationship goals often look at other people's relationships. The truth is that no one knows what really goes on behind closed doors. Although a couple may look happy at that moment, you do not know what emotions, inhibitions, or doubts may be lurking beneath the surface. Whilst externally focusing your efforts on another relationship, you may lose sight of the relationship you are in and begin to have expectations without discussing how you feel with your partner. Everyone is unique and every relationship is different for the couples involved. Instead of having this 'cookie-cutter' relationship standard, understand who you are and who you are with. As long as both people are authentic and secure in their relationship, comparisons are not necessary.

Marriage Counseling and Couples Therapy

There has been a lot of stipulation when it comes to the idea of marriage counseling. Some people question the point of paying a lot of money to go speak about marital issues or problems in the relationship with a "stranger." However, it should be seen as a wise and beneficial investment for the relationship. Communication is a necessity in any relationship, whether it be family, romantic, or a friendship. Going to a family member or friend about the problems in your relationship can be tricky because these people are often biased. Plus, they will probably be unable to give the thorough insight needed for each individual to understand what's actually transpiring in their union. Having an outsider who doesn't know either person and who is also qualified to speak on these matters will mean that they don't have much prejudice when it comes to addressing the issues. It also helps because there is a moderator present and everyone will have the opportunity to speak without being interrupted, dismissed, or disregarded.

According to some research and statistics concerning marriage counseling, up to 38 percent of couples who receive marriage therapy get divorces within four years of completing counseling. This is not because counseling is ineffective. Therapy is not a cure, but it is a preventative measure. Many couples go because it is their last resort and they are already burnt out. Before any problem in the relationship is detected, go to a counselor for a couple's session. You and your partner may learn new things about each other.

A healthy relationship is about building and sustaining. To protect your partnership, it is vital to love yourself, which will remove uncertainties, insecurities, and even some trust issues. Prioritize and invest in healthy communication with each other to reduce arguments. Couples shouldn't just be hearing each other, but actively listening. The tips listed are essential for your healthy relationship.